公园— Part 1 評分報告

建議: The student repeated the examiner’s question instead of answering. For improvement: answer directly with a topic sentence, add one or two short supporting details (specific memories or reasons), use linking words if adding details, and keep it under five sentences. Also avoid hesitation fillers like “umm.”

範例: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. I often played on the swings and had picnics with my family, which made those afternoons very memorable.

建議: The answer gives a basic response but has many hesitations, grammatical errors and unclear phrasing. To improve: start with a clear topic sentence, remove fillers, correct grammar (e.g., “parks” and “there are many children”), and give one specific reason or example using a linking word (e.g., “because” or “for example”). Keep it concise (1–3 sentences).

範例: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks because they are lively and have good play areas. For example, I like watching children play on the swings and walking there when the weather is pleasant.

建議: The answer addresses the question but has repetition, grammar mistakes and vague wording. To improve: give a clear topic sentence (yes/no), use correct plural/singular forms, explain a specific reason and add a linking word (e.g., “because” or “so”). Limit to 2–3 sentences and avoid filler words.

範例: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my village because there are no proper parks nearby, only wooded areas. A small playground and benches would give families a safer place to relax.

建議: The response is unclear and contains many hesitations and odd word choices (“good connected box”). To improve: state a specific type of park or a named park, explain why you want to visit it with clear reasons, use linking words (e.g., “because” or “so”), and keep sentences grammatically correct and concise.

範例: Yes, I would like to visit a well-maintained botanical garden near the city because it has many flower displays and shaded paths. I think it would be pleasant to walk there on a sunny day.

× Umm, normally, yes, I like going to park umm because there are so many people's children and also swings to play over there and uh, and the weather will be absolutely should be absolutely good.

✓ Umm, normally, yes, I like going to the park because there are so many children and also swings to play on, and the weather is usually very good.

Errors: 'going to park' needs definite article 'the park' (Article errors, ID 22). 'people's children' is awkward and incorrect; use 'children' (Sentence structure, ID 26). 'swings to play over there' should use preposition 'on' after 'play' (Incorrect use of prepositions, ID 11). 'the weather will be absolutely should be absolutely good' mixes modal and tense incorrectly; use simple present 'is usually very good' to describe habitual weather (Present tense issue, ID 6 and Modal verb usage, ID 4). Suggestion: Use 'the' with specific places, avoid possessive when unnecessary, use correct prepositions ('play on'), and express habitual states with present simple ('is usually').

× As I'm in the village, umm, I like to, I like to see more park in my village because there are no park here except the forest like places.

✓ As I'm in the village, I would like to see more parks in my village because there are no parks here except forest-like areas.

Errors: 'see more park' and 'no park' require plural 'parks' because talking about countable plural items (Singular and plural issue, ID 1) and missing articles/plural (Article errors, ID 22). 'forest like places' needs hyphenation and 'areas' is more natural: 'forest-like areas' (Incorrect use of adjectives or adverbs, ID 13 and Sentence structure, ID 26). Suggestion: Use plural for countable nouns when referring to more than one, and use hyphen for compound adjectives before nouns ('forest-like').

× Yeah, I wanted to visit a well cultivated and a good connected box, which is which, which is beautiful and it should be very, very like the weather should be.

✓ Yes, I want to visit a well-cultivated and well-connected park that is beautiful and has very pleasant weather.

Errors: 'I wanted' conflicts with the future intention question; use present/future desire 'I want' or 'I would like' (Present/Future tense issue, IDs 6 and 7). 'well cultivated' and 'good connected' need hyphens and correct adjective forms: 'well-cultivated' and 'well-connected' (Incorrect use of adjectives or adverbs, ID 13; Incorrect order of adjectives, ID 18). 'box' is incorrect noun for park; use 'park' (Sentence structure, ID 26). Repetition 'which is which' is ungrammatical (Sentence structure, ID 26). 'it should be very, very like the weather should be' mixes modals and is unclear; replace with 'has very pleasant weather' (Modal verb usage, ID 4). Suggestion: Match tense to question (use present/future for future plans), choose correct nouns, use hyphenated adjective phrases, and avoid redundant fragments.