公园— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more natural and grammatically correct: start with a clear topic sentence, avoid hesitations and filler fragments, and give one or two specific supporting details. Use linking words to connect ideas (for example, “also” or “because”). Keep it within 3–4 sentences.

範例: Yes, I loved going to parks when I was a child. They had swings and slides where I spent hours playing, and the open space felt safe for running around. Also, parks were a social place for parents to meet, so I often went with my family and our friends.

建議: Make sentences grammatical and concise. State your main point, then give specific reasons or examples. Use linking words like “because” or “so” and avoid unclear phrases (e.g., “ACT days activities”). Limit to 3–4 sentences.

範例: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks and try to visit every weekend. I find the fresh air and greenery help me relax after a stressful day because I can walk or sit quietly. For example, I often read a book on a bench or do light exercise there.

建議: Avoid hesitations and unclear words (e.g., “invent there”). Begin with a clear opinion, then give specific reasons and a short example. Use linking expressions like “because” and “so” to make your answer coherent.

範例: Yes, I would like more parks in my city because many existing parks are far from residential areas. More local parks would make it easier for families and elderly people to enjoy green space, and they would offer a simple way to relax after work or school.

建議: Be concise and avoid repetition. Give a direct answer naming the type of park you want and explain two specific features. Use linking words to connect points and correct grammar (e.g., “I prefer” not “I would like to prefer”).

範例: I would like to visit a simple, well-maintained neighborhood park in the future. Ideally it would have modern play equipment, plenty of trees for clean air, and benches where families can sit, because those features make it comfortable for everyone.

× Yes, I have to enjoy going to park a lot as a child.

✓ Yes, I enjoyed going to parks a lot as a child.

This sentence refers to a past habitual action, so the past simple 'enjoyed' is correct rather than 'have to enjoy' (which implies obligation). Also plural 'parks' or 'the park' is needed; 'going to park' is ungrammatical. Use 'parks' to match general meaning.

× Parks offer a variety of PL. stuff to play with and it was just a very good environment for small children.

✓ Parks offer a variety of play equipment and it was a very good environment for young children.

'PL. stuff' is informal and unclear; replace with 'play equipment' or 'play activities'. 'Small children' is better phrased as 'young children'. Maintain past tense 'was' to match 'offer' as general truth about parks; restructure for clarity.

× Not just for children but also the parents so they can connect well with other people because the park is a place where a lot of people meet together.

✓ Parks are not just for children but also for parents, who can connect with other people because parks are places where many people meet.

Original lacks parallel prepositions and has awkward clause connections. Add 'for' before 'parents' to match 'for children', change 'so they can' to a relative clause 'who can', and pluralize 'park' to 'parks' and 'meet together' to 'meet' for conciseness.

× Yes, I still like going to parks a lot.

✓ Yes, I still like going to parks a lot.

No grammatical error; the present simple 'like' correctly expresses current preference. No change required.

× They still continue provided pleasant environment and they help me unwind after a good difficult day.

✓ They still provide a pleasant environment and help me unwind after a difficult day.

'They still continue provided' is ungrammatical: use 'provide' as the verb; 'continue' is unnecessary. Include the article 'a' before 'pleasant environment'. 'Good difficult day' is contradictory; choose 'difficult day'. Also remove redundant 'they' before 'help' to make the sentence concise.

× ACT days activities.

✓ I also enjoy activities at the park during the day.

Original fragment 'ACT days activities' is unclear and not a complete sentence. Rephrase to a full sentence describing intended meaning: enjoying daytime activities at the park.

× Yes, I think my city needs more parks because, uh, some parks are very far away for some people and they need to be easily accessible so people can go and invent there anytime.

✓ Yes, I think my city needs more parks because some parks are very far away for some people and they need to be easily accessible so people can visit them anytime.

Remove filler 'uh'. 'Go and invent there' is incorrect word choice; 'visit' is appropriate. Use 'them' to refer back to 'parks'. Ensure 'anytime' is acceptable as one word. The sentence is now grammatically coherent.

× It because it is a very good environment for not only for that, just to calm your mind down.

✓ This is because parks provide a good environment not only for recreation but also to calm your mind.

Original missing main verb and has redundant 'for not only for that'. Start with 'This is because' to form a complete sentence, clarify the intended contrast 'not only... but also', and avoid redundant 'down' after 'calm your mind'.

× I honestly just preferred a basic park which has a good playing equipment, it has a good environment, it has good air around it and apart should be located in a place which is not a place that is very pollution friendly.

✓ I honestly prefer a simple park that has good play equipment, a pleasant environment, clean air, and is located in an area that is not polluted.

Use present tense 'prefer' when speaking about current preference. 'Playing equipment' should be 'play equipment'. Combine clauses to avoid repeated 'it has'. 'Not a place that is very pollution friendly' is awkward; use 'not polluted' or 'in an area with low pollution' for clarity.

× So I would like to prefer I would prefer a park like that.

✓ So I would prefer a park like that.

Remove redundancy 'I would like to prefer I would prefer'; a single 'I would prefer' is sufficient. This yields a concise, grammatical sentence.