公园— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Make your response fluent, grammatical and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one specific supporting detail using linking words. Avoid hesitations and repetitions. For example, say when you went, what you did, and with whom. Keep it to 2–3 sentences.

範例: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. In the afternoons I often played games and rode my bike there with my friends, and we sometimes had picnics under the trees.

建議: This answer is clear and well developed. To improve further, combine sentences to sound more natural and use a linking word to connect events. Also correct minor grammar (e.g., "went last week" not "went to last week").

範例: Yes, I still enjoy visiting parks. For example, I went last week with my family and we enjoyed the autumn colours, walking around the paths and taking photos together.

建議: Provide a clear topic sentence, then give two specific, well-formed reasons linked with connectors (e.g., "because", "and"). Improve grammar (singular/plural, articles) and choose more natural phrases (e.g., "benefit children's play" instead of "a lot of space for the children play").

範例: Yes, I would like more parks in our city because they help reduce air pollution and provide safe spaces for children to play. In addition, parks create attractive scenery that visitors and residents alike can enjoy.

建議: Start with a direct topic sentence and avoid contradictions (saying you have been there several times then want to go in the future is confusing). Clarify whether you mean returning or visiting for the first time. Use linking words (e.g., "because"), correct small grammar ("perfect for relaxing"), and keep it concise.

範例: Yes, I would like to return to Bueno Park in Tokyo because I have been there several times and its beautiful lake and peaceful atmosphere are perfect for relaxing.

× When I was a child I. Like to go to park for play and evening? No sorry.

✓ When I was a child, I liked to go to the park to play in the evenings.

Original has wrong tense and sentence fragments. 'I. Like' is incorrect; use past simple 'liked' because speaking about childhood. 'to park' needs definite article 'the park'. 'for play' should be 'to play'. 'evening?' should be plural 'in the evenings' to indicate habitual action. Suggestion: Use past simple for habitual past actions, include articles with singular countable nouns, and use 'to' before verbs of purpose.

× At the afternoon I I played with my friend.

✓ In the afternoon I played with my friend.

Use 'in the afternoon' not 'at the afternoon'. Remove the duplicated 'I'. The past simple 'played' is correct for a past event. Suggestion: Use 'in' with parts of the day and avoid repeated words.

× Yes, I often visit parks.

✓ Yes, I often visit parks.

This sentence is acceptable present simple for habitual action; no correction needed. (Included to show it meets the list but is correct.)

× I even went to last week with my family.

✓ I even went last week with my family.

Incorrect word order: 'went to last week' is wrong because 'go to' requires an object (place). If the place is omitted, use 'went last week'. If referring to a specific park, include it: 'I even went to the park last week.' Suggestion: Place time expressions ('last week') after the verb or at sentence end; include objects after 'went to' when needed.

× We enjoyed the autumn colors because the trees were covered in red and yellow leaves and we spent time walking and taking photos together.

✓ We enjoyed the autumn colors because the trees were covered in red and yellow leaves, and we spent time walking and taking photos together.

Comma added before conjunction joining independent clauses to improve clarity. Otherwise grammatically correct. Suggestion: Use punctuation to separate clauses for readability.

× Obviously, yes, I want more parks in our town because it reduces carbon dioxide and a lot of space for the children play in the afternoon.

✓ Obviously, yes, I want more parks in our town because they reduce carbon dioxide and provide a lot of space for children to play in the afternoons.

Plural 'parks' requires plural pronoun 'they'. 'Reduces carbon dioxide' should be 'reduce carbon dioxide' (parks reduce CO2). 'A lot of space for the children play' is ungrammatical: use 'provide a lot of space for children to play'. Use 'in the afternoons' for habitual time or 'in the afternoon' depending on context. Suggestion: Ensure pronoun agreement with plural nouns, use correct verb forms for plural subjects, and use 'for + noun + to + verb' for purpose.

× I think it also a good view for the foreigners.

✓ I think it is also a good sight for foreigners.

Missing verb 'is'. 'View' is awkward; 'sight' or 'attraction' is more natural. 'The foreigners' is too specific; use 'foreigners' generally without 'the'. Suggestion: Include the linking verb when describing something ('it is'), choose more natural nouns, and omit unnecessary definite articles.

× Oh yes, I would like to visit a park called Bueno Park in Tokyo.

✓ Oh yes, I would like to visit a park called Bueno Park in Tokyo.

This sentence is correct: 'would like' properly expresses a polite desire about the future. No change needed.

× I have been there several times and I want to go to in the future because it has a beautiful lake and peaceful atmosphere which is perfect relaxing.

✓ I have been there several times, and I want to go again in the future because it has a beautiful lake and a peaceful atmosphere which is perfect for relaxing.

Missing 'again' clarifies intention after having been there. 'Want to go to in the future' has extra 'to' — remove it. Add article 'a' before 'peaceful atmosphere'. 'Perfect relaxing' is incorrect; use 'perfect for relaxing' or 'perfectly relaxing'. Suggestion: Use 'again' when repeating visits, avoid extra prepositions, include articles before singular countable nouns, and use correct prepositional phrases ('perfect for...') or adverbs ('perfectly').