公园— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Reduce filler words and repetition, begin with a clear topic sentence, and add one specific detail to make the answer more vivid. Use correct grammar for plural/singular and past tense.

範例: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. I often rode my bicycle there and played tag with neighborhood friends, which helped me make close friends and stay active.

建議: Start with a direct topic sentence, avoid hesitation and repeated phrases, and explain briefly why you go less often using a linking word (e.g., because, although). Keep it to two or three clear sentences.

範例: Yes, I still like going to parks, but not as often as before because I am 17 and have a busy weekday schedule with school and homework. However, I try to visit on weekends to relax and meet friends.

建議: Give a clear opinion first, avoid repeating phrases, and use linking words (for example: because, so) to explain reasons with one specific example (e.g., a district lacking playgrounds). Correct sentence structure (avoid double verbs) will improve clarity.

範例: Yes, I would like more parks in my city because ongoing construction has reduced green spaces in my neighborhood, so many families and children have nowhere safe to play.

建議: Give a clear topic sentence about your future plan, mention a specific park or describe why the capital city park appeals to you, and finish the sentence. Use linking words like because or so and avoid trailing off.

範例: I don't have a definite plan, but I would like to visit the new central park in our capital city because it has modern playgrounds and beautiful gardens, and I hope to go there with my friends or family next summer.

× Of course, I think every child liked going, umm, like going to the park when they were child because they they could ride bike, meet their friends and play with other children and hang out in a green space.

✓ Of course, I think every child liked going, umm, like going to the park when they were children because they could ride bikes, meet their friends, play with other children, and hang out in green spaces.

Errors: 'when they were child' uses singular 'child' with plural 'they'; 'ride bike' should be plural 'ride bikes'; 'a green space' is unnecessary when referring generally. Suggestion: use plural forms to match the plural pronoun 'they' and pluralize countable nouns when speaking generally. Use commas to separate items in a list. Grammar problem type ID: 1

× Right now I'm 17 years old. I also like going there, but not as much as I was a child because nowadays I'm doing, I'm doing a lot of, I do a lot of work in, in weekdays and so I like, but not much.

✓ Right now I'm 17 years old. I still like going there, but not as much as I did as a child because nowadays I do a lot of work on weekdays, so I don't go as often.

Errors: tense and idiom issues around comparison to childhood and use of 'in weekdays'. Use 'did' for past comparison to childhood (past simple) and 'on weekdays' is the correct preposition. 'I'm doing a lot of' is awkward repetition; simplify to 'I do a lot of work'. Suggestion: use simple past for past states, and 'on' with weekdays. Grammar problem type ID: 3

× Yeah, why not? Of course, I want to say especially in my, in my, in my region, there are a lot of construction works are being done and many, many citizens don't have enough green space in the, in their in their yards and their children don't have place to play.

✓ Yeah, why not? Of course, I mean especially in my region, a lot of construction work is being done and many citizens don't have enough green space in their yards, so their children don't have a place to play.

Errors: 'construction works' should be 'construction work' (uncountable) or 'construction projects'; redundant 'are' in 'there are a lot of construction works are being done' needs fixing. 'the, in their in their yards' is repetitive and 'don't have place' requires an article: 'a place'. Suggestion: use uncountable noun 'construction work' or countable 'projects', remove extra verbs, and include articles before singular countable nouns. Grammar problem type ID: 22

× I don't have the specific park in the future, but of course some parks I want to visit some there is a park in our capital city and so I want to visit there with my friends or with my parents because it's new and it's.

✓ I don't have a specific park in mind for the future, but there are some parks I want to visit. There is a park in our capital city that I want to visit with my friends or my parents because it's new.

Errors: sentence is run-on, redundant words ('some parks I want to visit some'), incorrect article 'the specific park in the future'. Also sentence ends incomplete 'because it's'. Suggestion: split into clearer sentences, use 'a specific park in mind', and complete the final clause. Ensure each sentence has a single clear idea. Grammar problem type ID: 26