Hobby— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Cải thiện: Tránh lặp từ và ngừng sử dụng tiếng lặp/âm tiết thừa (ví dụ: "uh", "helping helping"). Bắt đầu bằng câu trả lời trực tiếp, sau đó thêm 1–2 câu hỗ trợ rõ ràng và cụ thể. Sử dụng liên từ để mạch lạc (ví dụ: "because", "so", "which"). Hạn chế độ dài tối đa 4-5 câu; sửa lỗi ngữ pháp nhỏ như possessive (people's lives).

Example: I don't have any regular hobbies at the moment because I'm very busy with work. However, when I have free time I enjoy reading Chinese romance novels because they are emotional and escapist, which helps me immerse myself in other people's lives and forget daily stress.

Suggestion: Cải thiện: Sử dụng cấu trúc chủ đề rõ ràng (Yes/No + câu giải thích). Chú ý phát âm và ngữ pháp ("elementary school", "sent to drawing classes"). Tránh chi tiết không rõ ("A skipped"). Thêm liên từ để kết nối ý ("also", "so"). Cụ thể hóa một hoặc hai ví dụ về tác phẩm hoặc cảm nhận để tăng tính thuyết phục.

Example: Yes. I took drawing and painting classes when I was in elementary school, and I often sketched fashion designs during class to give to my classmates. I also practised watercolor and acrylic painting, and I used to frame some of my best pieces to hang on the wall, which made me very proud.

Suggestion: Cải thiện: Trả lời trực tiếp rồi giải thích bằng thì chính xác (mix of past and present). Tránh lặp "as my as my" và dùng cụm từ tự nhiên như "became" hoặc "got heavier". Dùng liên từ để mạch lạc ("because", "so"). Giữ dưới 5 câu và cụ thể về thời điểm thay đổi (ví dụ: university, job).

Example: Not really. I enjoyed reading and drawing when I was younger, but I gradually gave them up when my workload increased at university, so I hardly had time for those hobbies anymore.

Suggestion: Cải thiện: Trả lời trực tiếp không cần bắt đầu bằng 'But'. Bổ sung liên kết so sánh ngắn ("unlike me", "for example") và có thể nói liệu bạn có thử tham gia hay không. Giữ câu rõ ràng và chính xác; tránh từ ngữ thông tục quá mức nếu muốn lịch sự ("scrolling TikTok videos" OK nhưng phát âm cần chính xác).

Example: No, I don't share the same hobbies as my family members. For example, my dad enjoys gardening and planting trees, my mother likes watching short videos on TikTok, and my brother spends most of his free time playing video games.

× I haven't had any hobbies recently because I've been very busy with work, but when I have more free time, uh.

✓ I haven't had any hobbies recently because I've been very busy with work, but when I have more free time I will.

The student uses present perfect and present simple inconsistently and leaves the sentence incomplete. Add a clear future clause 'I will' or 'I plan to' to complete the thought and match the time frame. Suggestion: use 'I will take up a hobby' or 'I will read more' to be specific.

× I used to love reading Chinese romance novels.

✓ I used to love reading Chinese romance novels.

This sentence is grammatically correct; no change needed. It correctly uses 'used to' to indicate a past habit.

× They were emotional and escapist helping helping me immerse myself in other people lives and forget daily stress.

✓ They were emotional and escapist, helping me immerse myself in other people's lives and forget daily stress.

Errors: duplicated word 'helping', missing comma before participle phrase, missing apostrophe in 'people's', and incorrect noun plural possessive. Fix by removing the duplicate, adding a comma, and using the possessive form 'people's lives'.

× I was sent to drawing and painting when I was an element elementary school.

✓ I was sent to drawing and painting when I was in elementary school.

Original has misspelled 'element' and wrong preposition 'to' with 'sent to drawing and painting' is acceptable but more natural is 'sent to drawing and painting classes' or 'sent to study drawing and painting'. Also include preposition 'in' before 'elementary school'. Suggestion: 'I was sent to drawing and painting classes when I was in elementary school.'

× I often sketch fashion designs during class and give the finished drawings to my classmates A skipped.

✓ I often sketched fashion designs during class and gave the finished drawings to my classmates.

Tense consistency: the student describes past habits, so use past simple 'sketched' and 'gave'. Remove stray 'A skipped' which appears to be an error. Suggestion: keep tense consistent and delete extraneous words.

× I also practiced watercolor and acrylic painting and I would put some of my best pieces in frames to hang on the wall.

✓ I also practiced watercolor and acrylic painting, and I would put some of my best pieces in frames to hang on the wall.

Sentence is mostly correct but needs a comma before 'and' to separate clauses for clarity. Tense 'practiced' and 'would put' correctly describes habitual past actions.

× Not really, I usually enjoy reading and drawing when I was younger, but I gradually gave them up as my as my workload and study commencement become much heavier so I hardly had any time for those hobbies anymore.

✓ Not really. I usually enjoyed reading and drawing when I was younger, but I gradually gave them up as my workload and study commitments became much heavier, so I hardly had any time for those hobbies anymore.

Inconsistent tenses: 'usually enjoy' should be past 'usually enjoyed' to match 'when I was younger'. Duplicate phrase 'as my as my' must be removed. 'Commencement' is wrong word choice; use 'commitments' or 'studies'. Verb 'become' should be past 'became'. Add punctuation and commas for clarity.

× But I actually can't think of any similar hobbies among my family members.

✓ I can't think of any similar hobbies among my family members.

Beginning a sentence with 'But' is informal; removing it improves formality. The sentence is otherwise correct.

× My dad loves gardening and planting trees, my mom enjoys scrolling Tiktok videos, and my brother spends most of his free time playing video games.

✓ My dad loves gardening and planting trees, my mom enjoys scrolling TikTok videos, and my brother spends most of his free time playing video games.

Sentence is grammatically correct; only correction is capitalization of the brand name 'TikTok'. Maintain present simple 'loves/enjoys/spends' for habitual actions.