朋友— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Answer the comparison more directly and use clearer grammar. Avoid repeating “precious,” and explain both past and present meeting places. Use linking words such as “whereas” and “because” to connect the ideas naturally.

範例: Yes, there is. When I was at university, I usually met my friends on campus or near our homes, whereas now I meet them in cafés in Tokyo. Since many of my old friends live far away, I really value the time we spend together.

建議: Give a complete topic sentence instead of starting with “Because.” Replace unnatural phrases such as “place by place” and “deliver information” with “depending on the place” and “have a conversation.” Include a specific example to make the answer more effective.

範例: Some places are suitable because they are quiet and comfortable, which makes it easy to have a conversation. For example, a quiet café is ideal for catching up. In contrast, crowded bars can be difficult because the background noise makes it hard to hear each other.

建議: State your preference clearly with “I prefer spending time with...” Avoid confusing expressions such as “quantity of the conversation” and “may grade.” Explain one clear advantage of groups, and contrast it naturally with spending time one-to-one.

範例: I prefer spending time with a group of friends because the atmosphere is usually more lively. We can discuss different topics and hear a variety of opinions. However, I prefer meeting one friend when I want to have a deeper or more personal conversation.

建議: Use the structure “Yes, I would” and avoid the unnatural phrase “make some conversations.” Correct “It is so private atmosphere” to “It has a private atmosphere,” and mention a concrete activity you would do together at home.

範例: Yes, I would. My home has a relaxed and private atmosphere, so we can talk without being disturbed. We could also cook a meal, watch a film, or play board games together, which would make the visit enjoyable.

建議: Use the plural form “Friends” and organize the answer around one clear reason. Avoid repeated phrases and incomplete structures. Explain how friends support you or broaden your perspective, then add a brief result or example.

範例: Friends are extremely important to me because they support me when I have problems and make my life more enjoyable. We also exchange ideas, so talking to them often broadens my perspective. I feel happier and less stressed after spending time with close friends.

建議: Correct “go outside” to “go out,” “makes me relax feel relaxed” to “helps me relax,” and “energetable” to “energetic.” Express the frequency naturally with “at least once a week,” and give one specific example of what you do.

範例: Yes, I do. I usually go out with my friends at least once a week because it helps me relax and feel more energetic. We often have dinner together or take a walk while catching up on each other’s lives.

建議: This answer has a clear structure and relevant reasons, but use articles and more natural collocations: “a café,” “have a conversation,” and “enjoy the scenery and greenery.” Add a specific example of a café or park if possible.

範例: We often meet at a café or in a nearby park. A café is convenient because it is usually quiet enough to talk but not completely silent. We also like the park because it is spacious, and we can enjoy the scenery while taking a walk.

建議: Use “talk about” or “share information about” rather than “share about.” Correct “one of my friends is also researcher” to “one of my friends is also a researcher,” and explain the work-related topic more clearly.

範例: We usually chat because we have many things to discuss. One of my friends is also a researcher, so we sometimes talk about our work and share the latest information in our fields. We also discuss everyday topics, such as films, food, and travel.

建議: Complete your final sentence and clarify the meaning of “viewer perspective.” Use “I have several friends I have known since...” and explain how your perspectives have changed while your friendship has remained strong.

範例: Yes, I have several friends I have known since elementary school and junior high school. Although our perspectives have changed as we have grown older, we still enjoy spending time together. We have shared many important memories, so we remain close friends.

× Yes, there is when I was a university student or before I lived in Tokyo but I now moved to Tokyo so I feel so precious precious to meet them because they're far away.

✓ Yes, there was a difference when I was a university student or before I lived in Tokyo, but I have now moved to Tokyo, so meeting my friends feels more precious because they live far away.

Use there was because you are referring to a difference in the past. Use have moved because the move to Tokyo has a connection with the present. Avoid repeating precious.

× Because environment is completely different place by place.

✓ Because the environment is completely different from place to place.

Environment is a singular countable noun in this context, so it needs the definite article the. The standard expression is different from place to place.

× Some places are so quiet and it is so comfortable to communicate, but some other louder places a little bit difficult to deliver information because of the noise.

✓ Some places are very quiet, so they are comfortable for communication, but in some louder places, it is a little difficult to communicate because of the noise.

The second part originally lacks a subject and a verb. Adding it is makes the sentence grammatically complete. The conjunction so also expresses the logical relationship more clearly.

× I prefer to spend with many friends because it is so great opportunity to have great amount of conversations.

✓ I prefer to spend time with many friends because it is a great opportunity to have a large number of conversations.

The expression spend requires the noun time. Great opportunity is a singular countable noun, so it needs a. Conversations is countable, so a large number of is more appropriate than great amount of.

× Of course, the quantity of the conversation may grade when I when I talk with just one person, but amount or is so much better, I guess.

✓ Of course, the amount of conversation may be greater when I talk with just one person, but the amount of conversation is much greater when I talk with a group, I guess.

The original sentence contains repeated words and incomplete phrases. The corrected version has complete clauses and a clear comparison between talking with one person and talking with a group.

× Yes, I would like to Home is the best place to make some conversations because there are no other people there.

✓ Yes, I would. Home is the best place to have conversations because there are no other people there.

The answer Yes, I would is a complete response to the question. The original phrase I would like to is incomplete because it is not followed by a verb. Conversations is normally used without some in this context.

× It is so private atmosphere and we can talk a lot.

✓ It has a very private atmosphere, and we can talk a lot.

Atmosphere is a singular countable noun here, so it needs an article. The verb has is also required because an atmosphere is something a place possesses.

× Friend is the most important thing for me because so because it takes it gives me so great time not only expand our opinion but also we can have great time to because share.

✓ Friends are the most important people to me because they give me a great deal of enjoyment. They also help me expand my opinions and share good times with them.

The original sentence contains repeated conjunctions, incomplete phrases, and incorrectly connected clauses. Dividing the ideas into two complete sentences makes the structure clear.

× I like to go outside with my friends because it makes me relax feel relaxed.

✓ I like to go out with my friends because it makes me feel relaxed.

After makes me, use the base verb feel. The adjective relaxed describes your emotional state, while relax is a verb and cannot be used directly in this structure.

× Also, making some conversation makes me so energetable and at least I will do once a week.

✓ Also, having conversations makes me feel energetic, and I go out with my friends at least once a week.

Energetable is not the correct adjective; energetic describes a person who has energy. The original final clause is missing an object and uses an unnecessary future form. Use the present simple for a regular habit.

× We often meet at Cafe or at the park. Cafe is a great place to make some conversation because it is not too quiet or too noisy. Also park is nice because it's so wide and we can enjoy the view or green.

✓ We often meet at a café or in the park. A café is a great place to have a conversation because it is not too quiet or too noisy. The park is nice because it is spacious and we can enjoy the view and the greenery.

Use a before a singular countable noun when referring to any café. Use the park when referring to a particular park or the park as a known place. The original nouns café and park need appropriate articles.

× I'm sure one of my friends is also researcher so I sometimes share about the work working topics or the information about the newest one.

✓ One of my friends is also a researcher, so I sometimes share information about our work or the latest research with him.

Researcher is a singular countable noun, so it needs the article a. The original phrase work working topics is incorrectly formed; use information about our work or the latest research instead.

× Yes I have some of them are the friends from elementary school or junior high school.

✓ Yes, I have some friends whom I have known since elementary school or junior high school.

The original sentence combines two structures incorrectly: I have some friends and some of them are friends. The corrected sentence uses the plural noun friends and clearly expresses the time relationship with since.

× Sometimes we notice that the viewer perspective is little bit changed from them, but we're even now great friends because well each.

✓ Sometimes we notice that our perspectives have changed a little, but we are still great friends even now.

Use our perspectives because the speaker is comparing the friends' viewpoints. Use the present perfect have changed for a change that began in the past and remains relevant now. Still is the appropriate adverb for an ongoing friendship.