广告— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Cần cải thiện ngữ pháp (thì và danh từ số ít/ số nhiều), phát âm và trật tự từ để câu tự nhiên hơn. Nên bắt đầu bằng câu chủ đề ngắn gọn, sau đó thêm chi tiết cụ thể (ví dụ: màu sắc, giai điệu, thông điệp) và dùng liên từ để mạch lạc (e.g., because, so, and). Hạn chế lặp từ (advertise/advertisement) và sửa các lỗi như “memorizable flow” thành “memorable melody”.

範例: Honestly, one advertisement that impressed me as a child was a Vietnam Milk commercial. It featured a friendly cow as the brand symbol and a very memorable melody, which made the ad easy to remember. Because the song was catchy and the visuals were colourful, many children, including me, wanted that milk. As a result, the campaign was very effective.

建議: Cần sửa cấu trúc câu và từ vựng (trains, transport, chains?) để rõ ý. Tránh tiếng nản (uh) và dùng liên từ để nối ý. Nên nói trực tiếp: yes/no + lý do cụ thể, kèm ví dụ nơi thấy quảng cáo (bus, stations, apps).

範例: Not really. I don't see many ads on trains or buses; most advertising I notice is online or in newspapers. For example, I often encounter banner ads on websites and sponsored posts on my smartphone apps, rather than posters inside public transport.

建議: Cần hoàn thiện ngữ pháp (subject-verb agreement: "ads give" not "advertisement give") và làm rõ ý cuối câu (uncomfortable for environments?). Dùng cấu trúc mạch lạc: state opinion, give positive reason, give negative reason with linking words (however, but). Tránh lặp từ và filler.

範例: It depends. I like advertisements that provide useful information and spark my curiosity about a product. However, if the same ad appears too often, it becomes annoying and spoils the environment. Therefore, I prefer ads that are informative and not intrusive.

建議: Cần rút gọn câu chủ đề, bỏ tiếng lấp lửng (umm), sửa từ vựng (memorizable → memorable, celeb celebrity redundant) và dùng liên kết để giải thích vì sao. Nên đưa ví dụ cụ thể (tên bài hát, thương hiệu, celebrity) để tăng tính thuyết phục.

範例: As a teenager, I prefer ads with a memorable song and a well-known celebrity as the brand ambassador. For instance, when a popular singer performs in a commercial, I pay more attention because the music sticks in my head and the celebrity makes the product seem trustworthy.

建議: Cần cải thiện độ chính xác ngữ pháp và trật tự từ, loại bỏ lặp từ (pop up pops up) và filler. Nên trả lời trực tiếp, nêu tần suất (often, always), mô tả loại quảng cáo (banner, pop-ups, sponsored) và nêu ví dụ về không liên quan, kèm ý kiến (annoying, distracting).

範例: Yes, very often. Many pop-up and banner ads appear when I use my smartphone or computer, especially after searching for something. For example, I sometimes see ads for unrelated products that distract me from my work, which I find quite annoying.

× To be honest, when I was a child, I am impressed by a advertise, by an advertisement by Vietnam Milk.

✓ To be honest, when I was a child, I was impressed by an advertisement by Vietnam Milk.

The speaker mixes present and past tenses; 'am impressed' should be past 'was impressed' to match 'when I was a child'. Also 'a advertise' is incorrect word form and article: use the noun 'advertisement' with the indefinite article 'an' before a vowel sound. Suggestion: keep past tense consistent and use correct noun form: 'was impressed by an advertisement'.

× They use a cow as a symbol of their product, and they also use the special song with the memorizable flow and the catchy.

✓ They used a cow as a symbol of their product, and they also used a catchy, memorable song.

Tense should match earlier past context so 'use' becomes 'used'. 'Memorizable flow' is unnatural; use 'memorable' as the adjective for 'song'. Word order: adjectives like 'catchy' and 'memorable' should come before 'song'. Also 'the catchy' is incomplete; place adjectives before the noun: 'a catchy, memorable song'.

× Actually, I think there's not uh, many advertising that appear in the chains or other transport instead of that it's mainly uh, appeared in the newspaper or in the website in other smartphone.

✓ Actually, I think there aren't many advertisements that appear on trains or other transport; instead, they mainly appear in newspapers or on websites and smartphones.

'There's not many' is incorrect: use plural 'there aren't many' for plural noun. 'Advertising' should be plural 'advertisements' or uncountable 'advertising' with different structure. 'chains' is likely 'trains'. Use preposition 'on trains' and 'in newspapers' or 'on websites'. Use 'appear' not 'appeared' to match tense. Also 'in the website in other smartphone' is ungrammatical; use 'on websites and smartphones'.

× Actually, I think it depends. If the advertisement give me the useful information and also boost my curiosity about the products, I think that is a good way.

✓ Actually, I think it depends. If the advertisement gives me useful information and also boosts my curiosity about the product, I think that is a good thing.

In conditional present-real sentences, use third-person singular verb forms: 'advertisement gives' and 'boosts'. 'The useful information' can be 'useful information' (no article). 'Products' can be singular 'product' or 'products' depending on meaning; 'the product' or 'products' is possible. 'Is a good way' is better as 'is a good thing' or 'is a good approach'.

× But instead if is like appear many times and is maybe, uh, create a, uh, uncomfortable for environments for the.

✓ But if it appears many times and maybe creates an uncomfortable environment, it's annoying.

Missing subject and wrong verb forms: use 'it appears' (third-person singular) and 'creates' (third-person singular). 'Create a uncomfortable' needs article 'an' and correct adjective order: 'an uncomfortable environment'. The original sentence lacked a clear subject and had extra filler; simplify for clarity.

× For me, a teenager, I think that the advertising that contains A umm like memor, memorizable song and also have a like celeb celebrity that in that's as an ambassador for the brand, I think that is a good way to boost the demand.

✓ For me, as a teenager, I think that advertisements that contain a memorable song and also have a celebrity as a brand ambassador are a good way to boost demand.

Use plural 'advertisements' to match general statement. 'Contains' should be 'contain' to agree with plural subject. 'Memorizable' is nonstandard; use 'memorable'. Remove filler words. 'Have a celebrity that in that's as an ambassador' is ungrammatical; use 'have a celebrity as a brand ambassador'. Use 'are' for plural subject and 'boost demand' without 'the' unless specific demand is meant.

× Definitely yes uh, there are several advertisements that pop up pops up when I use smartphone or the computer uh, whenever I have like search the information about my work is like uh has so many advertisement that not related to my information that I search for.

✓ Definitely yes, there are several advertisements that pop up when I use my smartphone or computer. Whenever I search for information about my work, there are many advertisements that are not related to the information I am searching for.

Remove duplicate 'pops up'. Use possessive 'my smartphone' and 'computer' without 'the'. For the clause 'whenever I have like search', use 'whenever I search'. 'Has so many advertisement' should be 'there are many advertisements' (plural) and 'not related to the information I search for' should be 'not related to the information I am searching for' or 'I search for'. Maintain consistent tense and correct subject-verb agreement.