自行车— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Answer the question directly first, for example, “No, I didn’t.” The phrase “since I was charged” is unclear; use a clear time expression such as “when I was a child.” Explain how living in a mountainous area affected your interest in cycling, and avoid repeating the idea about watching bicycle races. Use natural phrases such as “watch cycling races on TV.”

範例: No, I didn’t have a bike when I was a child. I grew up in a mountainous area, so cycling wasn’t very convenient for me. However, I enjoyed watching bicycle races on TV.

建議: State your opinion in a clear topic sentence, such as “Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country.” Then give one or two specific, understandable reasons. Replace unclear phrases like “increase their efficiency in land capabilities” with natural wording, and explain what you mean by using bikes to carry goods or earn money. Avoid the unfinished ending, “That’s why they are.”

範例: Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country. Many people ride them for exercise, especially on mountain roads. In some communities, people also use bicycles to transport goods and earn a living.

× Clearly I haven't had any bike since I was charged because I lived in a high altitude place in Mountain Place.

✓ Clearly, I haven't had any bikes since I was charged because I lived in a high-altitude place in Mountain Place.

In a negative sentence, any usually goes with a plural countable noun when referring to an unspecified number. Use any bikes rather than any bike. The phrase high-altitude is commonly hyphenated when it comes before a noun.

× That's why I didn't get in any interest in getting a bike.

✓ That's why I didn't have any interest in getting a bike.

Get in any interest is not a grammatical verb phrase in this context. Use have interest in something. You can also say, 'That's why I wasn't interested in getting a bike.'

× But I liked it because I liked to watch a bicycle games in television on on television.

✓ But I liked it because I liked to watch bicycle games on television.

A cannot be used before the plural noun games. Remove a, or use a singular noun such as 'a bicycle race.'

× But I liked it because I liked to watch a bicycle games in television on on television.

✓ But I liked it because I liked to watch bicycle games on television.

The usual preposition for watching a program or event on TV is on, not in. Avoid repeating the preposition; say 'on television' once.

× Of course, my country the bikes are in my are in more popular because many people like to ride their bikes as sport activities in mountains to increase their efficiency in land capabilities.

✓ Of course, bikes are more popular in my country because many people like to ride them for sports activities in the mountains to improve their abilities on land.

The original has repeated and misplaced phrases, which make the sentence structure difficult to follow. Use a clear subject and verb, as in 'bikes are more popular in my country.' The revised sentence also places the location phrase 'in my country' naturally.

× Of course, my country the bikes are in my are in more popular because many people like to ride their bikes as sport activities in mountains to increase their efficiency in land capabilities.

✓ Of course, bikes are more popular in my country because many people like to ride them for sports activities in the mountains to improve their abilities on land.

Use for to describe the purpose or activity associated with riding bikes: 'ride them for sports activities.' The natural preposition with mountains in this context is in, with the definite article: 'in the mountains.'

× And also it can act as in a kind of part of community activities because many people use bikes for carrying luggages for getting money.

✓ Also, biking can be part of community activities because many people use bikes to carry luggage and earn money.

The sequence 'act as in a kind of part' combines incompatible constructions. Use 'be part of' directly. To express purpose, 'use bikes to carry' is a clear construction.

× And also it can act as in a kind of part of community activities because many people use bikes for carrying luggages for getting money.

✓ Also, biking can be part of community activities because many people use bikes to carry luggage and earn money.

Luggage is an uncountable noun in English and does not normally take a plural -s. Use luggage, not luggages.

× That's why they are.

✓ That's why they are popular.

The sentence ends with the linking verb are but does not include a complement to explain what the bikes are. Add the intended description, such as popular, to complete the sentence.