自行车— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Answer the question directly, then describe the bike and explain how you used it. Avoid repetition and unfinished phrases such as “actually received it” and “But eventually.” Use correct noun phrases: say “training wheels,” not “a training wheels,” and use the past tense consistently. Link the details more smoothly with words such as “also” and “eventually.”

範例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. I got my first one when I was about ten, and my dad taught me how to ride it. It was red with a silver bell and training wheels. Eventually, I learned to ride without them and often cycled around my neighborhood.

建議: Give a complete sentence after your opening opinion and connect the reason with “because” or “for example.” Avoid the sentence fragment “many young people and students” and the unnecessary repetition of “popular” and “many people use them.” Be more specific by mentioning where people cycle or why bikes are convenient, such as avoiding traffic or saving money.

範例: Yes, I think bikes are fairly popular in my country, especially among students and young adults. Many of them use bicycles to commute to school or work because they are inexpensive and convenient. In busy cities, bikes also help people avoid traffic, although cycling is less common in areas without safe bike lanes.

× It was red and it had a silver bell and a training wheels.

✓ It was red and had a silver bell and training wheels.

Training wheels is a plural noun, so it cannot be used with the singular article a. Remove a before the plural noun. The second it is also unnecessary because the subject is already clear.

× But eventually.

✓ But eventually, I learned to ride it on my own.

But eventually is not a complete sentence because it has no subject or verb. Add a complete clause, such as I learned to ride it on my own, to express the result clearly.

× I think bikes are pretty popular in my country, many young people and students. Use them to commute to school or their workplace.

✓ I think bikes are pretty popular in my country because many young people and students use them to commute to school or work.

The original sentence incorrectly joins two independent ideas with a comma, and Use them is separated from its subject and verb. Combine the ideas with because and keep many young people and students use them together as one complete clause.