自行车— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Answer directly and avoid repetition and hesitation. Use “my father” or “my dad” instead of “my daddy” for a more natural tone. Correct “at firstly” to “at first,” “how can I ride it” to “how to ride it,” and “write it” to “ride it.” Organize the response with a clear sequence: receiving the bike, learning to ride it, and describing your feelings. You can also replace repeated phrases such as “actually” and “So” with more precise linking expressions.

範例: Yes, I did. When I was five, my dad bought me a red bike, and I was incredibly excited because it was my first one. At first, I didn’t know how to ride it, so he taught me in a nearby park. After a few practice sessions, I became quite confident and really enjoyed cycling around my neighborhood.

建議: Give a clear answer first and correct the likely mistake “reading a book” to “riding a bike.” Use “near the seashore” rather than “to the next to the seashore,” and say “many people are concerned about their health” instead of “there are a lot of people think about their health.” Avoid repeating “they use bikes” and finish with a complete conclusion. Add one or two specific reasons, such as exercise, commuting, or relaxed seaside cycling, and use linking words like “because” and “in addition.”

範例: Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country, especially in coastal areas. If you visit the seaside, you can see many people cycling for exercise or simply to relax. In addition, some people use bicycles for short journeys because they are inexpensive and environmentally friendly. However, they are probably more common for recreation than for commuting.

× I didn't have any information about how can I write it.

✓ I didn't know how to ride it.

In an indirect question, the word order is not the same as in a direct question. Use subject + verb order, as in how I could ride it, or use the simpler structure how to ride it. Also, ride is the correct verb for using a bike; write means to produce text.

× At firstly I was a little bit excited to ride it.

✓ At first, I was a little excited to ride it.

At first is the correct adverbial expression. Firstly is normally used to introduce the first point in a list, not to describe the beginning of a situation. A little is also more natural than a little bit in this sentence.

× I was very happy.

✓ I was very happy.

This sentence is grammatically correct and does not need a change. It is included as an individual sentence for completeness.

× There are a lot of people think about their health.

✓ There are a lot of people who think about their health.

After a noun phrase such as a lot of people, use a relative clause with who before the verb think. The structure there are people who think is grammatical.

× They use bikes in their daily life and that's why I think a lot of people.

✓ They use bikes in their daily lives, and that's why I think bikes are popular among many people.

The phrase I think a lot of people is incomplete because think needs a complete idea after it. Add the subject bikes and the adjective popular to complete the meaning. Daily lives is also more appropriate when referring to many people.