自行车— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Improve grammar, fluency and clarity. Start with a direct topic sentence, use past tense correctly, avoid fillers/repetition, and add one brief supporting detail. For example, say ‘No, I didn’t have a bike when I was a child’ and then give a reason or short memory. Also limit to 1–2 sentences and remove hesitation sounds like “uh” and repeated words.

範例: No, I didn’t have a bike when I was a child. My family couldn’t afford one, so I usually walked to school or played with friends who owned bikes.

建議: Make your response more coherent and specific. Start with a clear topic sentence (Yes/No and why), then give 1–2 supporting details linked with words like ‘because’ or ‘for example’. Avoid vague phrases (‘these athletes’) and reduce fillers. Use present tense and concise vocabulary: e.g., explain popularity, reasons, and a concrete example.

範例: Yes, I think bikes are still popular in my country because they are an affordable way for children to exercise and have fun. For example, many neighborhoods have bike clubs and weekend markets where families ride together.

× Hi I do not have a bike when I when when I was child.

✓ Hi, I did not have a bike when I was a child.

The sentence mixes present tense 'do not have' with a past time expression 'when I was a child'. Use past tense 'did not have' to match the time reference. Also add the article 'a' before 'child' and remove repeated words. Suggestion: use past simple for completed past events: 'I did not have a bike when I was a child.'

× Yes, because, uh, nowadays children's use technology more than, uh, more than these athletes.

✓ Yes, because nowadays children use technology more than before.

The original has an incorrect possessive 'children's' and an odd comparison to 'these athletes' which doesn't fit context. This is a sentence structure and word choice error. Use the plural noun 'children' as the subject and a clear comparison phrase like 'more than before' or 'more than they used to'. Remove filler words for clarity. Suggestion: 'Nowadays children use technology more than before.'

× So they want the, umm, the bike is more important or must be available in the, in our country to make children go and play rather than sit and using phone.

✓ So they think bikes are important and should be available in our country to encourage children to go out and play instead of sitting and using phones.

Problems include unnecessary definite articles 'the bike' and 'the, in our country', incorrect modal phrasing 'must be available' (better as 'should be available'), and an ungrammatical phrase 'sit and using phone'. Also 'using phone' needs plural 'phones' or 'their phones' and the gerund structure should be 'sit and use'. Suggestion: use plural 'phones', the modal 'should' for recommendation, and parallel verb forms: 'to encourage children to go out and play instead of sitting and using their phones.'