自行车— Part 1 評分報告

建議: ปรับโครงสร้างประโยคให้ชัดเจนและเป็นธรรมชาติมากขึ้น โดยเริ่มด้วยประโยคตอบตรง (topic sentence) แล้วตามด้วยรายละเอียดสั้น ๆ ที่เป็นลำดับเวลา อย่าใช้คำซ้ำหรือไวยากรณ์ผิด เช่น การใช้กาลเวลาและการเชื่อมประโยคให้ถูกต้อง ตัวอย่างที่ควรแก้ไข: ‘I had a bike’ เป็นประโยคหลัก จากนั้นระบุว่าใครให้และเมื่อไรโดยใช้วลีเชื่อม เช่น ‘It was a birthday gift from my parents about six years ago.’

範例: Yes, I did. I had a bike when I was a child. It was a birthday gift from my parents about six years ago, and I used it to ride around my neighbourhood every day.

建議: ปรับความชัดเจนของความคิดและไวยากรณ์ ใช้ประโยคเริ่มต้นตอบตรงตามด้วยเหตุผลหรือรายละเอียดที่ชัดเจน ใช้คำเชื่อม (because, although, therefore) และคำศัพท์ที่เหมาะสม (types, people, use) แก้คำสะกดและลำดับคำ เช่น ‘there are many types of transportation, but bikes are one of the most popular’ และให้ตัวอย่างหรือเหตุผลสั้น ๆ ที่สนับสนุนคำตอบ

範例: Yes, I think bikes are very popular in my country. Although there are many types of transportation, bikes remain a common choice because they are cheap and convenient for short trips. For example, many people use bicycles to commute to nearby shops or schools.

× Yes, when I was young I had a bike from my parents is a birthday gift around six years ago.

✓ Yes, when I was young I had a bike from my parents that was a birthday gift about six years ago.

The sentence contains a run-on and incorrect clause connection. The clause 'from my parents is a birthday gift' is ungrammatical: a relative clause is needed ('that was a birthday gift') and 'around' is better as 'about' for time reference. Suggestion: use a relative pronoun and correct verb tense ('was') to join the ideas and replace 'around' with 'about' for clearer timing.

× Yes I think bikes are very popular in my country. They have so many type of transportation in my country but by is one of the most popular.

✓ Yes, I think bikes are very popular in my country. There are many types of transportation in my country, and bikes are one of the most popular.

Errors: 'They have' wrongly refers to people; use 'There are' to state existence (There be issue - but primary is quantifier/type). 'so many type' should be 'many types' (plural noun with quantifier). 'by' is a typo for 'bikes'. Suggestion: use 'There are' for listing available transport, plural 'types', and correct noun 'bikes'.

× The people over uses to go in somewhere.

✓ People often use them to go somewhere.

Multiple errors: 'The people over' is unnecessary and incorrect; use 'People often' for general statements. 'uses' is wrong form (subject 'People' needs plural verb 'use'). 'to go in somewhere' is incorrect preposition and structure; use 'to go somewhere' or 'to travel to places'. Suggestion: simplify to 'People often use them to go somewhere.'