自行车— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be direct and clearer: start with a simple topic sentence stating whether you had a bike, then briefly explain why, using correct grammar and one or two supporting details. Avoid filler words (uh, um) and repeated phrases. Use linking words like because or so to connect ideas.

範例: No, I didn't have a bike when I was a child because my family couldn't afford one. As a result, I learned to walk and use public transport instead, although I sometimes borrowed a neighbor's bike to play with.

建議: Answer directly then give two specific supporting points with linking words. Reduce hesitation and repetition. Use clearer vocabulary (children, adults, commute, parks) and give a brief example or contrast to support your view.

範例: Yes, I think bikes are quite popular. For example, many children and adults ride bikes for leisure in parks, and a growing number of people use bicycles to commute to work because it is cheaper and faster in congested areas.

× I didn't have a bike, uh, when I was a child, uh, when I uh, because, uh, I can't learn, uh, learned, uh, to a bike and, and, and nobody, uh, uh, nobody can, uh, learn to me can't.

✓ I didn't have a bike when I was a child because I couldn't learn to ride a bike and nobody could teach me.

The student mixed past and present tenses and used incorrect verb forms. 'I didn't have' is correct past simple, so related verbs must also be past: use 'couldn't' (past ability) instead of 'can't', and 'could teach' (past ability) instead of 'can'. 'Learned to a bike' is ungrammatical; the correct phrase is 'learn to ride a bike'. Remove filler words and repeated fragments for clarity. Suggestion: keep all verbs in the past when describing past situations and use 'learn to ride' and 'could/couldn't' for ability in the past.

× Yes, I think, uh, because uh, some of, uh, some of kids and uh, some of adults, uh, bikes in free time, uh, in their St. in the park.

✓ Yes, I think some kids and some adults ride bikes in their free time in the park.

The original sentence omits the verb 'ride' and has word order issues. When describing habitual actions in the present, use the simple present 'ride'. Also use correct quantifier phrasing: 'some kids' and 'some adults' (not 'some of kids'). Remove filler 'uh' and unclear 'St.' Suggestion: use simple present for regular habits and include a main verb (ride bikes).

× And anyway, umm, some of the people, uh, when uh, go to, uh office, go to uh, office, go to.

✓ Also, some people ride bikes when they go to the office.

The student used an incomplete and repetitive structure with missing verbs. For habitual present actions use simple present 'ride'. The phrase 'when they go to the office' requires the pronoun 'they' and the verb 'go'. Remove repetition and filler words. Suggestion: form a single clear clause for habitual actions: 'Some people ride bikes when they go to the office.'