学习— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Votre réponse est naturelle et informative, mais vous devriez gagner en concision et en fluidité. Évitez les hésitations remplies ("umm") et les redondances (répéter "actually" ou reformuler la même idée). Commencez par une phrase thématique claire, puis ajoutez une ou deux phrases de soutien avec des détails précis (par exemple, ce que les professeurs ont fait pour vous aider). Utilisez des mots de liaison simples pour la cohérence (for example, because, and).

範例: I recently graduated from high school in Geneva, Switzerland. The teachers there were very supportive, offering extra help after class and individualized feedback. Because of this supportive environment and friendly classmates, I had a really positive school experience.

建議: Bonne réponse claire, mais limitez les répétitions et améliorez l'organisation: commencez par l'information directe (where), puis fournissez un détail pertinent suivi d'une explication courte. Évitez les phrases trop longues et les digressions. Remplacez "honestly" par un adverbe moins familier ou supprimez-le si inutile.

範例: I studied at a private high school in Geneva, Switzerland. It was an excellent experience because the school offered small classes and lots of extracurricular opportunities. My parents initially preferred a French public school, but I chose private school since my French was strong enough.

建議: Réponse positive et pertinente, mais évitez les expressions familières ("gonna") et les exemples vagues ("for example universe"). Donnez un ou deux exemples concrets de comment la multiculturalité vous a aidé (par ex. collaboration sur projets, échange d'idées). Utilisez des mots de liaison pour relier les idées (for instance, therefore).

範例: Yes, it's a great place to study because Geneva's multicultural environment exposed me to many perspectives. For instance, working with classmates from different countries improved my teamwork skills and taught me how to communicate across cultural differences.

建議: Réponse bien structurée avec un point clair et des détails personnels. Pour améliorer, soyez plus concise et fournissez une suggestion constructive (par ex. proposer un programme d'activités après l'école). Utilisez une phrase d'ouverture nette, puis expliquez l'impact et proposez une solution ou un souhait réaliste.

範例: I'd prefer the school to be less strictly academic to allow time for extracurriculars. Many students missed sports like gymnastics, swimming and football, which affected our well-being. It would help if the school scheduled dedicated after-school activity slots twice a week.

建議: Bonne intention et motivation claire, mais évitez les répétitions et rendez votre raisonnement plus direct. Ouvrez par votre plan, puis expliquez brièvement deux raisons spécifiques (intérêt pour l'économie, compétence en maths) et terminez par un commentaire sur vos objectifs futurs. Limitez-vous à 2–3 phrases nettes.

範例: I plan to study economics in the UK. I chose economics because I enjoyed related courses in high school and I have a strong background in mathematics, which suits the subject. I believe an economics degree will prepare me for a career in finance or policy analysis.

× I am a student, I just recently graduated in May.

✓ I am a student; I recently graduated in May.

Use simple adverb placement: 'just recently' is redundant. 'Recently graduated' or 'just graduated' is idiomatic. Use a semicolon or period to separate clauses for clarity.

× I have spent all my, well not all of my education, but all of my high school education in Switzerland and it has been honestly quite a nice experience.

✓ I spent most of my education, in particular all of my high school years, in Switzerland, and it has honestly been a very nice experience.

Replace present perfect 'have spent' with simple past 'spent' because the time (high school) is completed; clarify 'not all of my education' and avoid filler 'well'. Position adverb 'honestly' before 'been'.

× UMM. I have found the teachers to be very helpful.

✓ Um, I found the teachers to be very helpful.

Use 'Um' as a filler and use simple past 'found' to match completed experience. Avoid isolated sentence fragments like 'UMM.'

× UMM and my friends have also improved my student experience here.

✓ Um, my friends also improved my student experience here.

Place filler 'Um' correctly and use simple past 'improved' for a completed period. Remove 'have' to match past context.

× Currently I am not in any university, but for high school I studied at a private school in Geneva, Switzerland.

✓ Currently I am not at any university, but for high school I studied at a private school in Geneva, Switzerland.

Use preposition 'at' with 'university' rather than 'in'. 'Currently' requires present simple 'am not at'. The rest is past and correct.

× But I do know in the beginning my parents wanted me to go to a French public school but I refused because my French level was high enough.

✓ At the beginning, my parents wanted me to go to a French public school, but I refused because my French level was not high enough.

Meaning was likely reversed: refusal because level was insufficient, so 'not high enough' is correct. Use past tense consistently and add comma after introductory phrase.

× I think that this multicultural experience is gonna be able to help me in future scenarios.

✓ I think that this multicultural experience will help me in future situations.

Avoid informal 'gonna be able to'; use 'will help'. Use 'situations' rather than 'scenarios' for naturalness.

× For example universe.

✓ For example, when dealing with people from different backgrounds in the future.

Fragment 'For example universe' is unclear. Provide a full clause illustrating an example. Add comma after 'For example'.

× I would like them to be a little less academics focused because a lot of us didn't have much time for after school activities and I miss doing the ones that I did in primary.

✓ I would like the school to be a little less academically focused because many of us didn't have much time for after-school activities, and I miss doing the ones I did in primary school.

Use adjective 'academically focused' (adverb + adjective) not 'academics focused'. Use 'the school' or 'it' instead of 'them'. 'A lot of us' -> 'many of us'. Add hyphen in 'after-school' and specify 'primary school'.

× I used to be very big on gymnastics and swimming and also football, but when I moved to this school there was no time for that because it's a very academic focused, rigorous system.

✓ I used to be very into gymnastics, swimming and football, but when I moved to this school there was no time for those activities because it has a very academically focused, rigorous system.

Use 'into' for liking activities. Use plural 'those activities'. Change 'it's' to 'it has' and 'academically focused' (adverb + adjective).

× I plan to study economics in the UK because it's a topic that I was very much interested in in high school and also I have always had a passion for math.

✓ I plan to study economics in the UK because it was a subject I was very interested in during high school, and I have always had a passion for maths.

Use 'was' for past interest; avoid duplicate 'in in' by using 'during high school'. Use 'maths' (British English) when referring to studies in the UK context.

× It's always been a very interesting topic for me and I didn't want to do a purely math degree because I thought it would be too difficult and so I just decided to do an economics degree instead.

✓ It has always been a very interesting subject for me, and I didn't want to pursue a pure maths degree because I thought it would be too difficult, so I decided to study economics instead.

Use 'subject' not 'topic' for academic fields. Use 'pursue' or 'study' and 'pure maths degree' for clarity. Combine clauses with commas and 'so' for logical flow.