学习— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and add a clear topic sentence with smooth phrasing; avoid redundancy (e.g., "right now" and "to be exact" are unnecessary together). Use a linking phrase if you add one brief detail.

範例: I’m a first‑year college student. I’m studying computer technology at Western Institute of Technology, so I’m focused on introductory courses this year.

建議: Combine the two short sentences to sound more natural and remove filler like "of course." Give one specific detail about the place to enrich the answer.

範例: I study at the Western Institute of Technology, which is located in Ilo City. It’s known locally for its strong computer‑technology programs.

建議: Start with a direct statement and follow with one specific reason. Replace vague phrase "good learning quality" with concrete examples (e.g., experienced lecturers, practical labs). Keep it to two sentences.

範例: Yes, it is. The institute has experienced lecturers and well‑equipped computer labs that help me develop practical skills in technology.

建議: Be grammatically correct and concise. State the change clearly and give a brief reason and possible benefit. Use linking words to organize the response. Avoid repetition and incorrect verb forms.

範例: Yes. I would introduce a simple uniform or dress code because right now students wear random clothes, which looks unprofessional. A uniform would create a stronger sense of identity and equality among students.

建議: Give a clear topic sentence about your study plans and follow with two specific, actionable plans. Remove hesitations and filler words, and use linking words (first, second, also).

範例: My study plan is to be more consistent and organized. First, I will create a study schedule to avoid cramming and procrastination; second, I will prepare thoroughly for quizzes and recitations by reviewing notes weekly and practicing past questions.

× I am a student right now I am in a first year college, a freshman to be exact.

✓ I am a student right now. I am in a first-year college, a freshman to be exact.

Run-on and hyphenation: 'first year' used as a compound adjective before 'college' should be hyphenated to 'first-year'. Also the original lacks proper sentence separation; add a period to avoid a run-on sentence. Suggestion: Use 'first-year college' and separate independent clauses with a period or conjunction.

× I started at Western Institute of Technology. It is located at ILO City of course.

✓ I study at the Western Institute of Technology. It is located in Iloilo City, of course.

Prepositions: Use 'study at' for attending an institution rather than 'started at'. For locations, use 'in' with a city. Also include the definite article 'the' for named institutions and correct city name capitalization and spelling. Suggestion: Say 'I study at the Western Institute of Technology. It is located in Iloilo City.'

× Yes, because Western Institute of Technology offers me a good learning quality that could help me gain knowledge and skills in technologies and computers.

✓ Yes, because the Western Institute of Technology offers a good quality of education that helps me gain knowledge and skills in technology and computing.

Word choice and quantifier: 'learning quality' is unnatural; use 'quality of education'. 'Offers me' is better as 'offers' without 'me'. Use 'technology' (uncountable) and 'computing' rather than 'technologies and computers'. Also change modal 'could help' to present 'helps' to match general fact. Suggestion: Use 'offers a good quality of education that helps me gain knowledge and skills in technology and computing.'

× Yes, I would like some simple changes especially into our uniform because in which we doesn't have our uniform, we only use a random clothes because we doesn't have any dress code or something. So that's why I wanted to change.

✓ Yes, I would like some simple changes, especially to our uniform, because we don't have a uniform; we just wear random clothes since we don't have any dress code. That's why I want a change.

Multiple issues: Prepositions and phrasing: use 'changes to our uniform' not 'into'. Pronoun-verb agreement and auxiliary: 'we doesn't' is incorrect; use 'we don't'. 'A random clothes' is wrong: 'random clothes' (no article) or 'random clothing'. Tense consistency: maintain present simple for general facts ('we don't have', 'we just wear') and use 'I want' instead of 'I wanted' to match current desire. Also use clearer punctuation and conjunctions. Suggestion: Use short sentences, correct negatives ('don't'), and 'random clothes' or 'random clothing'.

× My future study plans are of course first, don't cram, don't procrastinate, umm second, do my best especially when we have a quiz, exams or or even in recitation of course.

✓ My future study plans are, of course: first, don't cram and don't procrastinate; second, do my best, especially when we have quizzes, exams, or even in recitation.

Punctuation and plurality: Use colon to list plans and proper separators. 'Quiz' should be plural when speaking generally ('quizzes'). Remove filler 'umm' and duplicate 'or'. Maintain parallel structure in list items. Modal/imperative form 'don't' is acceptable for personal plans but present as items in a plan. Suggestion: Organize as clear items and use plurals for general instances ('quizzes').