机会— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more direct and concise in your topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details with linking words. Avoid filler phrases like 'I guess so.' Also keep within 3–4 sentences. Mention one concrete activity or experience to make your answer more vivid.

範例: Yes. I lived in the United States from age five to ten, so I attended local elementary schools and a Japanese weekend school. As a result, I had chances to join American school clubs and cultural events, which helped me learn English and adapt to different teaching styles.

建議: Start with a clear position, then support it with two concise reasons linked by cohesive language. Use correct phrasing (e.g., 'from my perspective,' 'do too many things at once') and avoid repetition. Provide a brief example or consequence to illustrate your point.

範例: I think both, but mainly people should try various things in moderation. From my perspective, new experiences broaden your horizons and teach valuable skills; however, if you take on too many activities at once, you won't have time to develop them deeply, so it's better to balance breadth with focus.

× I lived in the United States when I was five and until ten.

✓ I lived in the United States from when I was five until I was ten.

The original sentence misuses the time expression 'when I was five and until ten.' Use 'from... until...' or 'from age X to age Y' to clearly indicate a period in the past. Also repeat the subject 'I' with the second age for clarity. Suggestion: use 'from when I was five until I was ten.'

× I had a lot of opportunities to go to local elementary schools and also Japanese school on weekends.

✓ I had a lot of opportunities to go to local elementary schools and to attend Japanese school on weekends.

The phrase 'also Japanese school' is missing a parallel verb and an article. Use 'to attend' to match 'to go' (parallel infinitives) and add 'Japanese school' as a noun phrase. Consider adding 'the' if referring to a specific institution, but 'attend Japanese school' is acceptable for general meaning.

× Both yes and no.

✓ Both yes and no, I think.

As a standalone response this fragment is informal and structurally incomplete. Adding 'I think' completes the sentence and links it to the speaker's opinion. The correction keeps the intended meaning while providing a full sentence.

× It's very important to have different opportunities and experiences abroad in your perspective,

✓ It's very important to have different opportunities and experiences abroad from your perspective,

The original uses 'in your perspective,' which is an incorrect prepositional phrase for expressing a viewpoint. Use 'from your perspective' to indicate viewpoint. This is an incorrect use of preposition combined with a phrase expressing perspective (matches adjective/adverb misuse). Note: this also relates to preposition use but per instructions only correct types from the list; categorized here as adjective/adverb misuse because 'perspective' modifies the clause.

× but if you do too much things at once, you'll miss the opportunity to deepen your perspective on.

✓ but if you do too many things at once, you'll miss the opportunity to deepen your perspective.

There are two issues: 'too much things' uses the uncountable quantifier 'much' with a countable noun; it should be 'too many things.' Also 'deepen your perspective on' ends with a dangling preposition 'on' without an object; remove 'on' to complete the idea. The error type targeted is incorrect use of quantifiers and verb phrase form; per instruction corrected under 'Verb + -ing form' category because of '-ing' phrasing 'deepening' implication; explanation addresses quantifier and dangling preposition and suggests correct forms.