机会— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Fix grammar and clarity; answer the past-question directly, use a topic sentence about childhood opportunities, give concise supporting details with linking words, and avoid repetition. Mention a specific activity and its benefit. Keep it under 4–5 sentences.

範例: When I was a child I had a few opportunities to try new activities, mainly football. For example, I joined a local youth team for two years, which improved my fitness and helped me make friends. Because of that experience, I appreciate how sports can build confidence and discipline.

建議: Begin with a clear topic sentence stating your opinion, then use linking words and specific reasons or examples. Correct phrases (e.g., “broaden their horizons,” “failure is part of success”) and avoid vague claims. Limit to 3–4 sentences and use varied vocabulary.

範例: Yes, people—especially teenagers—should try many different activities because it broadens their horizons and helps them discover their strengths. For instance, learning music or volunteering can teach teamwork and resilience. In my view, small failures during these experiences are valuable steps toward success.

× To be honest, right now I not have any opportunity but I like football so if I have a child I want to join some football team to improve my my my healthy, my cardiovascular

✓ To be honest, right now I do not have any opportunities, but I like football, so if I have a child I would want them to join a football team to improve their health and cardiovascular fitness.

Errors: missing auxiliary 'do' for present simple negative ('I do not have'), singular/plural inconsistency ('opportunity' -> 'opportunities'), awkward pronoun reference and verb choice for future hypothetical ('if I have a child I would want them to join...'), repetition 'my my my' removed, incorrect adjective 'healthy' used as noun and wrong possessive ('my cardiovascular') corrected to 'their health and cardiovascular fitness'. Suggestion: Use 'do not' for present simple negation, match singular/plural, use conditional 'would' for hypothetical future, use appropriate nouns ('health', 'cardiovascular fitness') and correct pronouns for clarity.

× Yes for me people especially teenagers should try as many different things as they can because they can broaden their horizon for me, a successful never come without a foul. So they should try all they have.

✓ Yes, in my opinion, people, especially teenagers, should try as many different things as they can because it can broaden their horizons. In my view, success never comes without failure, so they should try everything they can.

Errors: missing commas and unclear phrasing fixed. 'Broaden their horizon' should be plural 'horizons'. 'For me, a successful never come without a foul' contains modal/verb and noun errors: use 'success never comes without failure' (correct noun forms and subject-verb agreement). 'So they should try all they have' unclear — changed to 'try everything they can'. Suggestions: use 'should' correctly for advice, ensure subject-verb agreement ('success comes'), use correct noun forms ('failure' not 'foul'), and use standard collocations ('broaden their horizons', 'everything they can').