机会— Part 1 評分報告

建議: 回答は直接質問に答えており内容は理解できるが、いくつか改善点があります。まず、文法や語法の誤り（例: "I had" より自然な "Yes, I did"、"which is made by" は過去の状況なので時制の一致が必要）を直すこと。次に、情報の構成を明確にするためにトピック文を短くし、その後で具体的な役割や成果（どのように調整したか、何を達成したか）を述べ、接続詞（for example, so, therefore など）を使って論理を強めてください。文の長さは最大5文に収め、冗長な表現を避けましょう。

範例: Yes, I did. In high school I became the leader of a filming club that had been started by an older student. He struggled to manage everything on his own, so I organised meetings, assigned tasks to members, and handled scheduling. As a result, our club completed several short films and participated in a local festival. This experience improved my teamwork and leadership skills.

建議: 意見は明確で一貫していますが、文法や語彙の正確さ、具体性を高める必要があります。主語と動詞の一致（"Trying different things give" → "gives"）、冠詞の使用（"a new skill" や "a new job"）を直してください。また、理由や具体例をもう少し詳しく述べ、接続詞（for example, therefore, because）で論理をつなぐと説得力が増します。最後の "you can find new entry" は不自然なので、代わりに "new opportunities" など明確な表現を使いましょう。回答は3〜4文にまとめてください。

範例: Yes, I think so. Trying different things gives people valuable learning opportunities and helps them develop new skills. For example, taking up an unfamiliar hobby or trying a different job can broaden your perspective and lead to new opportunities. Because of this, people often discover interests or talents they would not have found otherwise.

× Yes, I had.

✓ Yes, I did.

The original uses 'had' which is not the correct auxiliary for short answers to 'Did you...?' In questions in the past simple with 'did', the short affirmative response should use 'did' rather than the main verb in past form. Use 'Yes, I did.' Similarly, you can expand to a full sentence: 'Yes, I did have opportunities.' Suggestion: respond with 'Yes, I did.' or 'Yes, I did have opportunities.' to match the past simple question.

× When I was a high school student, I became a leader of a filming club, which is made by an older student.

✓ When I was a high school student, I became the leader of a filming club that had been started by an older student.

Problems: article choice and relative clause tense/structure. 'a leader' vs 'the leader' depends on context; here 'the leader' is natural. 'which is made by an older student' is ungrammatical: 'made' is not the right verb for founding a club and present tense passive conflicts with the past timeframe. Use 'started' or 'founded' in past tense and a defining relative clause 'that had been started by an older student' to show the action occurred before. Suggestion: use 'the leader' and 'that had been started by' or 'which an older student had started.'

× He found it difficult to manage all the club activities by his own, so I helped him to coordinate other students and management.

✓ He found it difficult to manage all the club activities on his own, so I helped him coordinate the other students and manage activities.

Problems: 'by his own' is incorrect; correct phrase is 'on his own.' 'Helped him to coordinate' is acceptable, but 'helped him coordinate' is more natural. 'and management' is vague and ungrammatical here; use 'and manage activities' or 'and with management.' Suggestion: use 'on his own' and rephrase the second part for clarity: 'helped him coordinate the other students and manage the club's activities.'

× Trying different things give people valuable learning opportunities and help them to develop a new skill.

✓ Trying different things gives people valuable learning opportunities and helps them develop new skills.

Subject-verb agreement and article/number. The gerund phrase 'Trying different things' is singular, so verbs must be 'gives' and 'helps.' Also 'a new skill' is too specific; 'new skills' or 'a new skill' can work but 'new skills' is more natural. Remove unnecessary 'to' after 'helps' when followed by bare infinitive. Suggestion: ensure singular subject takes singular verbs and match plural nouns when appropriate.

× For example, taking up an unfamiliar hobby or trying new job can broaden your perspective and you can find new entry.

✓ For example, taking up an unfamiliar hobby or trying a new job can broaden your perspective and help you find new opportunities.

Missing article before 'new job' — use 'a new job.' 'You can find new entry' is unidiomatic; use 'find new opportunities' or 'find a new entry point' depending on meaning. Also avoid repeating 'you' unnecessarily: '...can broaden your perspective and help you find...' Suggestion: add the article 'a' and replace 'new entry' with 'new opportunities' or 'new entry points.'