机会— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Raccourcis et structurez votre réponse : commencez par une phrase claire puis ajoutez un ou deux détails précis. Évitez les répétitions (« when I was young » deux fois) et utilisez des connecteurs simples pour la cohérence. Par exemple, remplacez des formulations vagues par des détails concrets (quel type d'activités manquait, ou un exemple de timidité).

範例: No, I didn't have many opportunities at school to try new activities. I was quite shy, so I avoided clubs and performances, and the school offered only a few options like basic sports and a choir. Therefore, I rarely joined anything.

建議: Clarifiez et organisez l'opinion: commencez par une réponse directe puis donnez deux raisons spécifiques et une brève conclusion. Évitez répétitions (« I think and I'm convinced », « people have chances to live »). Utilisez des connecteurs comme « because » et « for example » pour plus de clarté.

範例: Yes, I believe people should try many different things because it helps them discover their strengths and interests. For example, trying a new hobby or a short course can reveal hidden talents or career ideas. Overall, experimenting with activities makes life more fulfilling.

× No I didn't have many chances when I was young to try new activities at my school because I was a bit shy when I was young and my school didn't have many activities to propose.

✓ No, I didn't have many chances when I was young to try new activities at my school because I was a bit shy and my school didn't offer many activities.

The sentence uses past tense correctly overall, but contains redundancy ('when I was young' repeated) and an incorrect verb choice 'to propose' for programs/activities. Replace the second 'when I was young' with nothing to avoid repetition and use the correct verb 'offer' for what a school provides. Also add a comma after 'No' for natural spoken writing.

× Of course they should because we only have one life and I think and I'm convinced that people have to try as many things they can, so they can know more about themselves.

✓ Of course they should because we only have one life, and I think, and I'm convinced, that people have to try as many things as they can so they can learn more about themselves.

The modal verbs 'should' and 'have to' are acceptable, but the phrase 'as many things they can' is missing 'as' after 'things' and 'know' is better replaced by 'learn' in this context. Also punctuation was improved for clarity. Suggestion: use 'try as many things as they can' and prefer 'learn' when referring to gaining self-knowledge.

× People have chances to live, so just live that life.

✓ People have only one life, so they should just live it.

The original sentence 'People have chances to live' is awkward and unidiomatic. Replace with 'People have only one life' to match the earlier idea, and use the object pronoun 'it' to refer to 'life'. Add 'should' if you want to keep advice tone. Suggestion: use concise, idiomatic expressions like 'just live it'.