机会— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and grammatically accurate. Start with a clear topic sentence that directly answers the question, then give one or two specific details. Avoid filler words (uh, like) and incorrect phrases (e.g., “school curricular activities” should be “co-curricular activities”). Also correct tense and frequency wording (e.g., “we had it on Fridays” not “daily we used to have on Fridays”).

範例: Yes. My school offered a range of co-curricular activities, and I chose craft as my main activity. For example, we had craft club meetings every Friday where I learned paper sculpting and made items for school fairs.

建議: Provide a direct opinion sentence first, then add one clear reason with a specific example. Keep sentences concise and avoid repetition. Use linking words appropriately (e.g., “because,” “for example,” “however”) and finish your thought fully — don’t leave the answer unfinished. Improve grammar: use singular/plural consistently and correct expressions (e.g., “help people grow into the person they want to be”).

範例: Yes, I believe people should try different things because it helps them discover their strengths and interests. For example, I tried painting and coding as a teenager; painting improved my creativity, while coding led me to pursue a technology course at university.

× Like in school we had ACCA that the school curricular activities in that we could choose, uh, any activities which we like.

✓ At school we had ACCA, which were the school's curricular activities that we could choose; for example, any activities we liked.

The original sentence has a confused structure and incorrect relative clause use; 'that the school curricular activities in that' is ungrammatical. Use a clear relative clause 'which were the school's curricular activities' and match tense/number: 'activities we liked' (past) fits the context.

× So I had shows, I had chosen craft as my CCA activity and daily we used to have on Fridays.

✓ So I had shows; I chose craft as my CCA activity, and we used to have it on Fridays.

The original mixes tense/forms ('had chosen' with 'used to have on Fridays') and uses 'daily' redundantly. Use simple past 'I chose' to describe a past decision and 'we used to have it on Fridays' to indicate habitual past. Also add 'it' to clarify what was held on Fridays.

× Yes, trying and exploring different things will help individuals to grow the person they are like to succeed the way they are.

✓ Yes, trying and exploring different things will help individuals grow into the people they want to become and succeed in their own ways.

The original uses awkward phrasing 'grow the person they are like to succeed the way they are.' Use 'grow into the people they want to become' and 'succeed in their own ways' for natural English and correct verb patterns after 'help' (help + bare infinitive or help + to-infinitive).

× So if you are stuck in something and then you are just not interested to explore, then you never get the chance to do it again.

✓ If you are stuck in something and not interested in exploring, you will never get the chance to try it again.

Original mixes tenses and incorrect verb/preposition choices ('interested to explore' is incorrect; use 'interested in exploring'). Also use future/modal consistency: 'you will never get the chance' is clearer than present simple 'you never get'.

× Like for example maybe by a certain age you would have

✓ For example, by a certain age you might have tried many things.

The original is an incomplete sentence fragment. Complete the idea with a main verb and object. 'You might have tried many things' fits the hypothetical past-in-future sense and completes the thought.