疲惫— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Câu trả lời có ý chính rõ ràng nhưng diễn đạt chưa tự nhiên và có nhiều lỗi ngữ pháp. Cụm “in the morning to Friday” nên sửa thành “from Monday to Friday”, còn “study and work in that” chưa rõ nghĩa và nên thay bằng “study and do assignments”. Hãy dùng cấu trúc trực tiếp: trả lời “Yes, I often do”, sau đó nêu lý do và kết quả. Tránh nối quá nhiều ý bằng “so” trong một câu dài.

範例: Yes, I often feel tired, especially from Monday to Friday. I have to attend classes and complete assignments during the day, so I usually feel exhausted when I get home.

建議: Câu trả lời chưa hoàn chỉnh về ngữ pháp và chưa trả lời tự nhiên câu hỏi về thời điểm. “in the school” nên là “at school”, và “something struggling in my life” cần sửa thành “when I’m struggling with problems in my life”. Hãy nêu một thời điểm cụ thể trước, chẳng hạn “at the end of a long school day”, rồi bổ sung một nguyên nhân khác nếu cần. Không nên bắt đầu bằng “It’s” khi muốn nói “Tôi cảm thấy mệt khi...”; hãy dùng “I feel tired when...”.

範例: I usually feel tired at the end of a long day at school. I also feel drained when I’m dealing with personal problems or a lot of stress.

建議: Câu trả lời có cấu trúc tốt: nêu hành động và lý do, đồng thời có ví dụ về việc làm cùng bạn. Tuy nhiên, “choose listening” nên sửa thành “choose to listen” hoặc tự nhiên hơn là “I listen to music”, “more comfortable” nên đổi thành “more relaxed”, và “unwise” có vẻ dùng sai từ; có thể thay bằng “refreshed”. Hãy dùng liên từ rõ ràng như “because” và “especially when”. Câu trả lời nên ngắn gọn hơn để tránh lỗi ở cuối câu.

範例: When I feel tired, I usually listen to music or play football. These activities help me relax and feel refreshed, especially when I do them with my friends.

建議: Câu trả lời đã thể hiện được ý “It depends”, nhưng câu có nhiều lỗi về cấu trúc và từ vựng. Nên nói “It depends on whether my parents allow me to go out” thay vì “if my parents accept me to do that”. “It helped me feel unwanted” là sai nghĩa; có thể dùng “It helps me feel less stressed and more relaxed”. Cuối câu cần diễn đạt rõ “spend time with my friends and strengthen our friendship”, đồng thời chia thành 2–3 câu ngắn để câu trả lời tự nhiên hơn.

範例: It depends on whether my parents allow me to go out. If they say yes, I usually meet my friends because spending time with them helps me feel less stressed. It also gives us a chance to strengthen our friendship.

× Yeah, definitely just because in the morning to Friday I have to go to school to study and work in that so when I come home, I feel exhausted.

✓ Yeah, definitely. From Monday to Friday, I have to go to school to study and work there, so when I come home, I feel exhausted.

The preposition phrase should be from Monday to Friday, not in the morning to Friday. Work there is also more grammatically appropriate than work in that because there refers to the school. The original sentence is too crowded, so it should be divided and connected with so.

× Uh, it's after a long day in the school or something struggling in my life

✓ Uh, it is usually after a long day at school or when I am struggling with something in my life.

Use at school rather than in the school when referring to the normal activity of studying. The phrase something struggling is incorrectly structured. Use when I am struggling with something to form a complete clause with the correct preposition with.

× When I feel tired, sometimes I choose listening to music or playing football because it helps me feel more comfortable and unwise especially I do it with my friend.

✓ When I feel tired, I sometimes choose to listen to music or play football because these activities help me feel more comfortable and relaxed, especially when I do them with my friend.

Choose is normally followed by the infinitive with to, so use choose to listen or play. Unwise means foolish and does not fit the intended meaning; relaxed is the appropriate adjective. These activities requires the plural verb help, not helps. The phrase especially I do it is incomplete, so use especially when I do them.

× It depends on my parents if my parents accept me to do that, I will go out with my friend because it helped me feel unwanted and comfortable so also can have a closer.

✓ It depends on whether my parents allow me to do so. If they do, I will go out with my friends because it helps me feel relaxed and comfortable, and I can also become closer to them.

Use whether to introduce the condition, and allow me to do so is the correct structure instead of accept me to do that. Because this describes a regular result, use the present-tense verb helps rather than the past-tense verb helped. Unwanted does not express the intended meaning; relaxed is more appropriate. The final clause needs a subject and a complete structure: I can also become closer to them.