纸— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Answer the question directly by saying what paper craft you made. Use the past tense consistently: “liked,” “made,” and “felt.” Avoid unclear phrases such as “make us photos” and “my Hopi.” Add one specific detail about the craft and explain why you enjoyed it. Keep the answer natural and within three or four sentences.

範例: Yes, I made paper drawings when I was a child. I often drew pictures of famous Punjabi singers, such as Sidhu Moose Wala and Karan Aujla. I enjoyed it because it made me feel happy and proud of my creativity.

建議: Begin with a clear topic sentence and use the past tense because the question asks about childhood. Organize the answer with a linking word such as “especially” or “because.” Correct unnatural expressions like “it fills me some happy” and explain how drawing helped you feel confident. Use accurate names and avoid listing too many examples without explanation.

範例: As a child, I liked drawing portraits of my favorite Punjabi singers, especially Karan Aujla and Sidhu Moose Wala. I usually copied their pictures from magazines or the internet. It was enjoyable because I felt proud and more confident whenever I finished a drawing.

建議: Give a direct answer at the beginning, such as “No, I rarely write physical letters now.” Distinguish clearly between your current habit and your childhood habit. Avoid repeating words like “professional” and use “letters,” not “lighters.” Explain why you prefer email, and mention that you might still write a letter for a special occasion.

範例: No, I rarely write physical letters nowadays. I usually use email or messaging apps because they are faster and more convenient, especially when I need to contact my cousins. However, I might write a handwritten letter to my parents or a close friend on a special occasion.

建議: State your opinion clearly instead of beginning with “It’s from their perspective.” Use “some people” and “many people,” not “someone like her” or “a large number of peoples.” Contrast the two groups with “although” or “however,” and explain why handwritten letters may still be kept, such as their sentimental value. Avoid ending the sentence with “and.”

範例: Yes, some people still keep handwritten letters, especially when they have sentimental value. For example, they may preserve letters from family members or loved ones because these messages feel personal and memorable. However, most people now communicate through text messages and email because they are much more convenient.

建議: Answer directly with “No, I don’t usually…” and explain that digital tools are more convenient. Correct “takes the large amount of space” to “takes up space,” and replace unclear phrases such as “over a summer carry bag” and “whenever I get free I use data.” Mention a specific phone function, such as the Notes app, and use a linking word to connect your reasons.

範例: No, I don’t usually carry paper and pens when I go out because they take up extra space in my bag. Instead, I use the Notes app on my phone to write down ideas or save memories. It is more convenient because I always have my phone with me.

× Well, when I was a child I like to make us photos of the this incursion like Siddhma Seala or Babumana.

✓ Well, when I was a child, I liked making pictures of occasions such as Siddhma Seala or Babumana.

The phrase when I was a child refers to a finished period in the past, so like should be changed to liked. Also, making is used naturally after liked.

× When I was in my childhood it was me, my Hopi by making the pictures of some famous persons.

✓ When I was a child, my hobby was making pictures of some famous people.

The original sentence does not have a clear grammatical structure. Use the pattern my hobby was + -ing form to explain the activity you enjoyed.

× That feels me some happy.

✓ That made me feel happy.

The sentence describes a past experience, so feels must be changed to made. After made, use the base verb feel, not felt or feeling.

× When I was in my childhood, I like to draw the pictures of my favorite Punjabi singers like Karan Ozila, Aura Siddhu, Musiala.

✓ When I was a child, I liked drawing pictures of my favorite Punjabi singers, such as Karan Ozila, Aura Siddhu, and Musiala.

Because the activity happened during childhood, use the past-tense form liked. The structure liked drawing is also appropriate for describing a past hobby.

× It fills niya some happy when I go see the my pictures wasn't my kind of by me and it fills me as I'm confident.

✓ I felt happy when I looked at the pictures I had drawn, and they made me feel confident.

The original sentence contains several incomplete and incorrectly connected clauses. The corrected version uses clear subjects and verbs and separates the two ideas logically.

× Recently, I used the e-mail app for the sending the letters to my cousins.

✓ Recently, I used an email app to send letters to my cousins.

After used, use the infinitive to send to express purpose. The phrase for the sending is not natural in this sentence, and letters does not need the definite article here.

× I used the e-mail app for the sending the letters to my cousins for my professional professional works.

✓ I used an email app to send letters to my cousins for my professional work.

Work is generally uncountable when it means a job or professional activity, so works is incorrect here. Also, repeating professional is unnecessary.

× When I was in my childhood, I like to use the physical lighters for giving the information to some special persons.

✓ When I was a child, I liked using physical letters to give information to some special people.

The activity refers to childhood, so like should be changed to liked. The phrase liked using is a natural way to describe a past preference.

× I liked to use the physical lighters for giving the information to some special persons for like my parents or cousins.

✓ I liked using physical letters to give information to special people such as my parents or cousins.

Use such as, not for like, to introduce examples. The preposition and expression have been changed to make the relationship between people and examples clear.

× It's from the their perspective Sir and someone like her to handwritten letters.

✓ It depends on people's perspectives, sir, and some people like handwritten letters.

The original sentence lacks a correct main structure. Use it depends on to introduce the factor that influences people's opinions, and use some people like to express a general preference.

× In the modern world, the large number of peoples are like to use the letters in their mobile phones.

✓ In the modern world, a large number of people like to use their mobile phones for messages.

People is already the plural form of person, so peoples is incorrect in this context. Also, use a large number of people and the base verb like after this plural subject.

× In the modern world, the large number of peoples are like to use the letters in their mobile phones.

✓ In the modern world, a large number of people like to use their mobile phones for messages.

Use the indefinite article a in a large number because the sentence refers to a general, non-specific quantity. The definite article the is not appropriate here.

× People are like to use the letters in their mobile phones by sending their pictures or by their app e-mail.

✓ People like using their mobile phones to send pictures or emails.

The expression are like to use is grammatically incorrect. Use like using or like to use. After to, use the base forms send and email.

× Well it takes the large amount of space in my bag over a summer carry bag.

✓ Well, it takes up a large amount of space in my shoulder bag.

Use a large amount because the amount is not specific. The phrasal verb takes up means occupies space, and a shoulder bag is a more grammatically complete noun phrase.

× I like to use the mobile phones for getting the my memories or noting the some ideas on the apple like notes.

✓ I like to use my mobile phone to record memories or note ideas in an app such as Notes.

Use to record and to note to express purpose. Use in an app, not on an app, and do not place the articles the before my or some.

× I like to use the mobile phones for getting the my memories or noting the some ideas.

✓ I like to use my mobile phone to record my memories or note some ideas.

The original sentence uses unnecessary articles before possessive and quantifier words. Say my mobile phone and some ideas without adding the before them.

× And whenever I get free I use data.

✓ Whenever I have free time, I use mobile data.

The expression get free is incomplete in this context. Use have free time as the natural noun phrase, and place the time clause before the main clause with a comma.