公园— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be direct with a clear topic sentence, correct grammar, avoid redundancy and keep response within 2–3 sentences. Use simple past consistently and correct verb forms (e.g., “I preferred reading” not “throwing myself reading”). Add one brief specific detail to support your statement.

範例: No, I didn’t enjoy going to parks as a child. I was quiet and preferred staying at home; I often read adventure books for hours because I loved imagining different worlds.

建議: Start with a clear topic sentence, use complete sentences and avoid trailing off. Keep to 2–4 sentences and use linking words (For example, “because” or “so”) when giving reasons. Replace vague phrases like “I also find it kind of” with a specific effect or feeling.

範例: Yes, I enjoy going to parks now because they help me both physically and mentally. For example, walking among trees gives me fresh air and reduces stress, so I feel calmer and more focused afterward.

建議: Answer directly then give one or two concise, specific reasons using linking words such as “because” or “so that.” Correct word choices (e.g., “more green spaces” or “more nature” and avoid awkward phrases like “throw themselves into”).

範例: Yes, I would. More parks and green spaces would give city residents places to relax and exercise, so people could clear their minds and recover from stressful workweeks.

建議: Be precise about the place name and avoid filler words (“uh”, “well”). Use correct vocabulary (e.g., “Yosemite National Park”) and give one or two specific reasons why you want to visit, using linking words like “because” or “for example.” Keep it to 2–3 clear sentences.

範例: I would like to visit Yosemite National Park in the United States because of its famous granite cliffs and waterfalls. For example, I want to see El Capitan and hike among the giant sequoias if I get the chance.

× Instead of going to park, I preferred to stay at home and throwing myself reading the books that I really enjoyed.

✓ Instead of going to the park, I preferred to stay at home and throw myself into reading the books that I really enjoyed.

Missing definite article 'the' before 'park' and wrong verb form 'throwing' after 'preferred' (should be base form after 'preferred to'). Use 'the park' for a specific place and 'preferred to stay ... and throw myself into reading' is grammatically correct.

× Instead of going to park, I preferred to stay at home and throwing myself reading the books that I really enjoyed.

✓ Instead of going to the park, I preferred to stay at home and throw myself into reading the books that I really enjoyed.

After 'preferred to' the verb should be in the base form (infinitive), not the -ing form. Also 'throwing myself reading' is unidiomatic; use 'throw myself into reading' to express immersing in an activity.

× Yes, I've changed since I've grown up.

✓ Yes, I've changed since I grew up.

When using 'since' with a past point in time, the simple past ('I grew up') is preferred rather than present perfect 'I've grown up'. 'I've changed' (present perfect) is fine to show a change up to now, but the clause after 'since' should refer to a past time.

× I believe that going to the park is much beneficial for me, both physically and mentally.

✓ I believe that going to the park is very beneficial for me, both physically and mentally.

'Much' is not idiomatic before most adjectives; use 'very' or 'much more' depending on context. 'Very beneficial' is the correct collocation.

× Spending time close to the trees and nature allows me to relax and unwind after working hard.

✓ Spending time close to trees and nature allows me to relax and unwind after working hard.

'The trees' suggests specific trees; in general statements omit the definite article. Also sentence is acceptable, this change makes it more natural.

× I also find it kind of.

✓ I also find it quite enjoyable.

'Kind of' is an informal, incomplete phrase here and leaves the sentence unfinished. Use 'quite enjoyable' to clearly express a positive feeling.

× Yes, of course, having more parks means that there are more nature, so people in the city can throw themselves into the natural space where they can clear their mind, relax and unwind after busy weeks.

✓ Yes, of course, having more parks means that there is more nature, so people in the city can immerse themselves in natural spaces where they can clear their minds, relax, and unwind after busy weeks.

'More nature' is uncountable so use 'is' not 'are'. 'Throw themselves into the natural space' is unidiomatic; use 'immerse themselves in natural spaces'. Also make plural agreement 'clear their minds'.

× Yes, of course, having more parks means that there are more nature, so people in the city can throw themselves into the natural space where they can clear their mind, relax and unwind after busy weeks.

✓ Yes, of course, having more parks means that there is more nature, so people in the city can immerse themselves in natural spaces where they can clear their minds, relax, and unwind after busy weeks.

'Throw themselves into' followed by a noun phrase is okay but 'throw themselves into the natural space' is unnatural; 'immerse themselves in' is a better verb phrase. Also adjust verb 'are' to 'is' for uncountable 'nature' and plural nouns/possessives for consistency.

× Well, the part that I really want to visit would be the Yosemite Park in the United States.

✓ Well, the park that I really want to visit is Yosemite National Park in the United States.

Use 'park' not 'part'. Proper name is 'Yosemite National Park' without 'the' before the proper noun in this structure; use 'is' rather than 'would be' for a simple statement of desire.

× I've heard that there are a lot of wildlife animals as well as. Uh, site in interesting sites in there.

✓ I've heard that there is a lot of wildlife there, as well as many interesting sites.

'A lot of wildlife animals' is awkward; 'wildlife' is uncountable and usually used without 'animals'. Use 'there is' for uncountable 'wildlife'. Rephrase 'interesting sites in there' to 'many interesting sites' and place 'there' appropriately.

× So if I got a chance, I would definitely, uh, visit that area.

✓ So if I get a chance, I will definitely visit that area.

The conditional form should match the likelihood: for a real possibility use first conditional: 'If I get a chance, I will...' Using 'got' + 'would' is the second conditional for unlikely or hypothetical situations. If the speaker means a real future possibility, use 'get' and 'will'.