公园— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Make the response grammatically correct, more natural and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence stating that you enjoyed parks, then give one or two specific supporting details (activities, feelings) using proper tense and linking words. Avoid contradictions (e.g., “can't make many friends” vs. making friends) and repetition.

範例: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. I often played on the swings and joined group games, which helped me make friends and feel happy and carefree.

建議: Use correct verb forms and clearer linking words. Provide a concise topic sentence about your current purpose for visiting parks, then add specific supporting details (activities, frequency) with connectors like “now” or “instead.” Keep it within 2–4 sentences.

範例: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks, but now I go mainly to relax. I usually walk to get fresh air and look for interesting plants or birds, which helps me unwind after a busy day.

建議: Clarify your main point and use accurate vocabulary. Say directly whether you want more parks, then explain one or two clear reasons (environmental benefit, recreational space) using correct terms like “reduce” or “absorb CO2.” Avoid vague phrases and repetition.

範例: Definitely. I would like more parks because trees help absorb carbon dioxide and improve air quality, and extra green spaces provide people with places to exercise and relax.

建議: Be concise and correct tenses; avoid repeating the park name. Start with a clear topic sentence naming the park, then give specific reasons (attractions you want to see, experiences you expect) and a brief comment on timing or who you would go with.

範例: I would like to visit Tokyo Disneyland because I’ve never been and I love the Disney characters. I’m especially excited to try the rides and watch the parades with my family.

× Yes, I like going to parks as a child because I can't make many friends in the park and this is my favorite childhood activity.

✓ Yes, I liked going to parks as a child because I couldn't make many friends and playing in the park was my favorite childhood activity.

The response refers to past habits, so past tense should be used (liked, couldn't, was). Also simplify 'in the park' repetition and clarify meaning by using 'playing in the park'. Suggestion: Use past simple for past routines and adjust auxiliary verbs accordingly.

× I can make friends playing with them and sharing my happiness with them.

✓ I could make friends by playing with other children and sharing my happiness.

When describing past ability and habitual actions, use past tense 'could' not 'can'. Also improve word choice and avoid repeating 'them'. Suggestion: Use 'could' for past ability and 'by + -ing' to show the method.

× Yes, I like going to parks now, but I not prefer to make friends in the park.

✓ Yes, I like going to parks now, but I do not prefer to make friends in the park.

Negative present simple requires auxiliary 'do' for verbs other than 'be'; use 'do not prefer' (or contraction 'don't prefer'). Suggestion: Use 'do/does' + not + base verb for present simple negatives.

× I change my goal to relax, get the fresh air and looking for some plants.

✓ I have changed my goal to relaxing, getting fresh air and looking for interesting plants.

Parallel structure requires matching verb forms. After 'change my goal to' use gerunds: 'relaxing, getting, and looking'. Also 'get the fresh air' is unnatural — use 'getting fresh air'. Suggestion: Keep verb forms parallel and use natural collocations like 'getting fresh air'.

× Definitely, yes. I think building more parks can face the problem of globalization because the trees can fix the problem about the emission emissions of carbon dioxide and ballparks can be more.

✓ Definitely. I think building more parks can help address environmental problems caused by globalization because trees can reduce carbon dioxide emissions, and we could also build more recreational areas.

'Can face the problem' is incorrect collocation; 'help address' fits. 'Fix the problem about the emission emissions' is wrong and repetitive — use 'reduce carbon dioxide emissions'. 'Ballparks can be more' is unclear; rephrase to 'build more recreational areas' or 'more parks and playgrounds'. Suggestion: Use clear verbs (help address, reduce) and avoid repetition; clarify intended idea about recreation spaces.

× I want to go the Tokyo Disneyland theme park because I never go here before and I like the Disney characters very much so I want to go the Tokyo Disneyland theme park to play and visit.

✓ I want to go to Tokyo Disneyland in the future because I have never been there before and I like the Disney characters very much, so I want to visit and enjoy the theme park.

When referring to an experience up to now, use present perfect 'have never been'. 'Go the Tokyo' needs preposition 'to'. Avoid repeating the full name twice; use natural phrasing 'visit and enjoy the theme park'. Suggestion: Use 'have never been' for life experience and include correct preposition 'to' after 'go'.