视图— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and natural. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific reasons using linking words. Avoid filler phrases and incorrect grammar (e.g., "remember about this moment that I was living" and "so I was so exploring").

範例: Yes, I love taking pictures of different views because it lets me preserve special moments. For example, when I travel I photograph sunsets and cityscapes so I can look back later and remember how the place felt.

建議: Give a clear topic sentence and support it with specific details. Fix grammar (singular/plural agreement) and remove repetitions. Use linking words like "because" and "for example" to connect ideas, and finish your thought instead of trailing off.

範例: I prefer views in rural areas because they are more natural and usually peaceful. For example, I enjoy quiet beaches and green fields where I can relax and take wide landscape photos.

建議: Answer directly and organize information logically. Begin with a clear statement, then give two specific contrasting examples (e.g., snowy south, tropical southeast). Remove hesitations and incorrect words ("my car"); use linking words like "for example" and "also".

範例: I prefer views in my own country because Brazil has a huge variety of landscapes. For example, the south can be cold with occasional snow, while the southeast has tropical beaches, so I can see very different scenery without traveling abroad.

× I really enjoy taking pictures of different views.

✓ I really enjoy taking pictures of different views.

No change needed. 'Enjoy taking' correctly uses the verb + -ing form after 'enjoy'.

× I think it's a way to capture the moment, especially the special moments.

✓ I think it's a way to capture moments, especially special ones.

Sentence is grammatical but wordy and slightly awkward. Simplify noun repetition by using 'moments' and 'special ones' to improve clarity and naturalness.

× And when I get older, I can see and just remember about this moment that I was living, so I was so exploring.

✓ And when I get older, I can look back and remember the moments I lived, so I enjoy exploring them.

Multiple issues: 'remember about' is incorrect — use 'remember' without 'about'; 'that I was living' is awkward for past experience — use 'I lived' or 'I experienced'; 'so I was so exploring' is ungrammatical. Also maintain present reference 'when I get older' with 'can look back'. Suggestion: combine into a clear clause: 'look back and remember the moments I lived'.

× I definitely prefer views in rural rural areas because I think they are more natural around UMM and is usually peaceful and quiet place.

✓ I definitely prefer views in rural areas because I think they are more natural around UMM and are usually peaceful and quiet places.

Errors: repeated word 'rural rural' — remove duplicate; subject 'they' refers to 'views' (plural) so verb should be 'are' not 'is'; 'place' should be plural 'places' to match plural subject. Ensure agreement between plural nouns and verbs.

× There are so many natural beauties, sometimes beaches and.

✓ There are so many natural attractions, such as beaches.

'Natural beauties' is nonstandard; use 'natural attractions' or 'beautiful natural places'. The phrase 'sometimes beaches and.' is incomplete. Provide a complete expression like 'such as beaches.'

× MMM definitely my own country because I, I was born in Brazil and my car, my country is so big.

✓ Definitely my own country, because I was born in Brazil and my country is very big.

Remove filler 'MMM' and repeated 'I,'; 'my car' is likely a mispronunciation for 'my country' — correct to 'my country'; replace 'so big' with 'very big' (both acceptable) and fix word order for natural English: 'Definitely my own country, because I was born in Brazil and my country is very big.'

× There are so many beautiful views.

✓ There are so many beautiful views.

Correct sentence; no grammatical change required.

× You, you feel like umm, cold weather.

✓ You can experience cold weather in some regions.

The original repeats 'you' and uses 'feel like' incorrectly. For describing climate, 'experience cold weather' or 'it can be cold' is more natural. Use 'in some regions' to clarify.

× We have snow on the South.

✓ We have snow in the south.

Use preposition 'in' with geographic regions: 'in the south'. Capitalization aside, 'south' as a region is lowercase unless part of a proper name.

× If you like beaches areas or tropical areas, you have umm, beaches on the southeast and you feel like.

✓ If you like beach areas or tropical regions, you have beaches in the southeast.

Use 'beach areas' or 'beach regions' rather than 'beaches areas'; 'on the southeast' should be 'in the southeast'. The final 'and you feel like' is incomplete and should be omitted or completed; here it's removed for clarity.