旅行— Part 1 評分報告

建議: 全体的に内容は適切ですが、文法と発音の小さな誤り、繰り返し、語順の自然さを改善する必要があります。具体的には：1) “It makes me feels” のような動詞の一致エラーを直す。2) 情報の重複（watching scenery / sometimes take photos）があるので要点を簡潔にまとめる。3) 接続詞を使って文を自然につなげる（for example、soなど）。4) 語彙を少し広げて感情や理由を詳しく述べる（e.g. calm, refreshed, peaceful）。

範例: Yes, I do, especially when the landscape is green and attractive. I enjoy watching the scenery pass by, and sometimes I take photos to remember the trip, because the view makes me feel calm and relaxed.

建議: 答えは明確ですが、口語のフィラー（"Oh"、"Uh"）と語の選び方を減らし、文法を整えると良いです。具体的には：1) フィラーを避けて直接答える。2) “make me feel peaceful and relaxing” は意味上の誤りがあり、“relaxing” は物を修飾する語なので“relaxed” を使う。3) 理由や頻度を加えて具体性を増す（how often / why）。

範例: Yes, I do. When the view outside is green and natural, I usually take a few photos to remember it because such scenes make me feel relaxed and peaceful.

建議: 内容は伝わりますが、冗長な表現と口語の詰まり（"UMM"）が目立ちます。改善点は：1) 直接的に比較して短く答える（"I prefer the mountains because..."）。2) 不必要なフレーズ（"It's in the middle of nowhere"）は別の言い方に置き換える。3) 接続詞で理由と効果を滑らかにつなぐ。4) 具体例（ハイキング、景色、空気）を加えると説得力が増す。

範例: I prefer the mountains because I like quiet, remote places. The fresh air and scenic views energize me, and I often go hiking there to relax and recharge.

× Yes I do if the landscape is green and attractive.

✓ Yes, I do if the landscape is green and attractive.

Missing comma after introductory 'Yes' and coordinating pause; not a tense error but punctuation improves clarity. Use comma after interjection. Also sentence is otherwise grammatically correct.

× I usually enjoy watching scenery pass by and sometimes I will take photos to remember the trip.

✓ I usually enjoy watching the scenery pass by, and sometimes I take photos to remember the trip.

Use of 'the scenery' requires definite article. Also prefer simple present 'I take' rather than 'I will take' when describing habitual actions. Combine clauses with comma and conjunction for clarity.

× It makes me feels very peaceful and relaxing.

✓ It makes me feel very peaceful and relaxed.

After 'makes me' the base form 'feel' (not 'feels') is required. 'Relaxing' describes something that causes relaxation; the correct adjective for a person's state is 'relaxed.' Use 'feel...relaxed.'

× Oh yes I do. Uh, if the scenery out of the window is green and natural, I usually take some photos to remember it.

✓ Oh yes, I do. If the scenery outside the window is green and natural, I usually take some photos to remember it.

Use 'outside the window' rather than 'out of the window' for natural phrasing. Add comma after 'Oh yes' for clarity. Tense and aspect are correct (habitual action).

× It will make me feel peaceful and relaxing.

✓ It makes me feel peaceful and relaxed.

For habitual or general statements, use simple present 'it makes'. Use 'feel' after 'makes' and 'relaxed' to describe the speaker's state; 'relaxing' would describe the thing causing the feeling.

× Yes, I prefer the mountains because I enjoy quiet and remote areas.

✓ Yes, I prefer the mountains because I enjoy quiet, remote areas.

Add comma between coordinate adjectives 'quiet' and 'remote' (optional stylistic). Pronoun use is fine; correction focuses on punctuation for clarity.

× It's in the middle of nowhere.

✓ They are in the middle of nowhere.

Refers to 'the mountains' (plural), so use plural pronoun/verb 'they are' instead of 'it is.' Subject-verb agreement and reference must match.

× The fresh air and beautiful scenery UMM always make me feel more energetic and relaxed.

✓ The fresh air and beautiful scenery always make me feel more energetic and relaxed.

Remove filler 'UMM'. The plural subject 'The fresh air and beautiful scenery' correctly takes plural verb 'make' — that was correct; main fixes are removing filler and ensuring natural flow.