建筑— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Cevap doğrudan ve anlaşılır, ancak tekrarlar var ve cümle yapısı basitleştirilebilir. Daha doğal bir başlangıç cümlesi kullanın, gereksiz tekrarları çıkarın ve kısa destekleyici detay (örneğin hangi tür binalar veya hangi semtlerde yoğunluk olduğu) ekleyin. Bağlaçları (because, so, therefore) daha dikkatli kullanın ve cümle sayısını 3–4 ile sınırlayın.

範例: Yes, there are many tall buildings near my home because I live in a densely populated city. For example, the downtown area has several high-rise apartment blocks and office towers to accommodate both residents and businesses.

建議: Cevap anlaşılır fakat iki kez aynı fikri tekrar etmişsiniz ve bağlam eksik. Daha doğal bir yanıt için kısa bir konu cümlesi verin, sonra nedenini bir veya iki nedenle destekleyin ve gerekiyorsa bir istisna örneği ekleyin. Dilbilgisi (photos yerine photo of → photos of) düzeltmesi yapın.

範例: No, I usually don't take photos of buildings because they are part of my daily environment and seem ordinary. However, if a building has an unusual design or historical importance, I might take a picture.

建議: İyi bir seçim ve sebep var, ancak tekrar eden ifadeler ('I would like to visit' tekrarları) ve dolgu sesleri (umm, so) bulunuyor. Sebebi daha spesifik yapın (örneğin manzara, mühendislik, gözlem terası) ve kısa bir kişisel bağ ekleyin. Tek cümlede konuyu belirtip ikinci cümlede detay verin.

範例: I'd love to visit the Burj Khalifa in Dubai because it's the tallest building in the world and offers amazing views from its observation deck. I'm especially interested in its architecture and would like to see the city panorama at sunset.

建議: Duygu ve kişisel deneyim iyi, fakat anlatımda tekrarlar, eksik cümle sonları ve dolgu kelimeler var. Kısa ve net bir konu cümlesiyle başlayın, sonra yaşadığınız deneyimi bir veya iki cümlede açıkça anlatın ve sonucu belirtin. Dilbilgisi düzeltmeleri (an earthquake, lived in a tall building) yapın.

範例: I like the look of tall buildings, but I wouldn't want to live in one because I'm afraid of earthquakes. I once lived in a high-rise when an earthquake struck the city, and the experience was so frightening that I prefer low-rise housing now.

× Yes they are because I live in a crowded city with a large population.

✓ Yes, there are because I live in a crowded city with a large population.

The subject 'there' with the verb 'are' is needed to answer a question about existence/placement; the original reply used 'they are' which incorrectly refers to 'buildings' without a clear subject. Use 'there are' or 'Yes, there are tall buildings near my home.' Also add a comma after 'Yes'. Suggestion: Say 'Yes, there are.' or 'Yes, there are many tall buildings near my home.'

× So in my city we need tall buildings because the population is very large.

✓ So in my city we need tall buildings because the population is very large.

No grammatical change needed for -ing forms; this sentence is acceptable. Keep present simple 'need' because it states a general fact.

× No, I don't take photos because it's where I live so it doesn't really catch my eye and I don't take photo of the buildings.

✓ No, I don't take photos because it's where I live so it doesn't really catch my eye and I don't take photos of the buildings.

Use the plural 'photos' consistently. Also after 'don't take' use the plural noun form. Suggestion: 'I don't take photos of buildings.'

× I would like to visit Burj Khalifa in Dubai because it's the tallest building in the world.

✓ I would like to visit the Burj Khalifa in Dubai because it's the tallest building in the world.

Use the definite article 'the' with famous buildings like 'the Burj Khalifa.' This is an article/preposition-related usage (articles are within prepositional context). Suggestion: 'Visit the Burj Khalifa.'

× Umm so I would like to visit it because it's so popular and also tourists go there when they visit Dubai, so I want to go to there.

✓ Umm so I would like to visit it because it's so popular and also tourists go there when they visit Dubai, so I want to go there.

The correct phrase is 'go there' not 'go to there.' 'There' already indicates location; adding 'to' is incorrect. Remove 'to'. Suggestion: 'I want to go there.'

× I like tall buildings, but I don't want to live in a tall building in the future because umm, I'm scared of earthquake.

✓ I like tall buildings, but I don't want to live in a tall building in the future because, umm, I'm scared of earthquakes.

Use plural 'earthquakes' when speaking generally about the phenomenon. Also keep present continuous 'I'm scared' for current feelings. Suggestion: 'I'm scared of earthquakes.'

× And I was living in that tall building in the past and we had a earthquake in my city and it was so scary because.

✓ And I used to live in a tall building in the past and we had an earthquake in my city, and it was very scary.

Use 'used to live' to describe a past habitual/state that no longer applies, or 'I lived' is also possible. 'A earthquake' is incorrect; use 'an earthquake' because 'earthquake' starts with a vowel sound. Remove the trailing 'because' or complete the clause. Suggestion: 'I used to live in a tall building, and we had an earthquake; it was very scary.'

× So that's why I don't want to live in a tall building.

✓ So that's why I don't want to live in a tall building.

This sentence is structurally fine. It correctly sums up the reason stated previously. No change needed.