食物— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and direct. Start with a clear topic sentence naming your favourite food, then give one or two brief reasons or an example. Avoid irrelevant personal labels and redundant phrases.

範例: My favourite food is sushi. I like it because it’s fresh and light, and I enjoy the variety of flavours from different types of fish and rice. For example, salmon nigiri is my go-to because of its buttery texture.

建議: Correct grammar and be specific. Begin with a clear topic sentence about liking fast food, then give a specific example and a short reason. Avoid mistakes (e.g., 'his Burger King') and informal filler words.

範例: When I was young I loved fast food, especially burgers from McDonald’s. I used to ask my mom to take me there because the burgers were tasty and it felt like a treat after school.

建議: Improve sentence flow and correct word choice. Use linking words to connect ideas and give a clear reason plus a specific example. Avoid sentence fragments and incorrect adjectives like 'scowling'.

範例: Yes, I do. In the summer I tend to eat more fruit and lighter meals because it’s too hot for heavy, warm dishes. For example, I often have cold watermelon or a fruit salad instead of a hot dinner.

建議: Be direct and avoid confusing or joking remarks. State clearly whether your favourite food has changed, give a concise reason and a short example. Fix grammar and avoid irrelevant comments.

範例: Yes, my favourite food has changed. As a child I liked burgers, but now I prefer sushi because I appreciate lighter flavours and more variety. For instance, I used to eat burgers every weekend, whereas now I often choose sushi for its freshness.

× Like many children, I swore by fast food and I would often convince my mom to get his Burger King or McDonald's because obviously what child is going to deny themselves a good burger?

✓ Like many children, I swore by fast food and I would often convince my mom to get me Burger King or McDonald's because obviously what child is going to deny themselves a good burger?

The sentence uses the wrong pronoun 'his' to refer to the speaker; it should be 'me' because the speaker is the object of the verb 'get'. Replace 'his' with 'me' to match the first-person perspective. Also ensure consistency in pronoun case: use object form after 'get'.

× During the hot summer weathers. I definitely eat more fruits than I eat full meals.

✓ During the hot summer I definitely eat more fruits than full meals.

The original has a sentence fragment 'During the hot summer weathers.' and uses the plural 'weathers' incorrectly. Combine into one sentence and use the uncountable/plural-appropriate phrasing 'hot summer' or 'hot summers'. Simplify the comparison to 'eat more fruits than full meals' to avoid repetition and improve parallel structure.

× It's probably because it's not very enjoyable to eat hot scowling meals when you can just have a nice cold piece of watermelon.

✓ It's probably because it's not very enjoyable to eat hot, scalding meals when you can just have a nice cold piece of watermelon.

The word 'scowling' is incorrect in this context; the correct adjective is 'scalding' to describe very hot food. Add a comma between 'hot' and 'scalding' for clarity. 'Scalding' is an adjective describing temperature, not 'scowling' which means facial expression.

× Well, unfortunately for you, I don't happen to remember my favorite show at Favorite Food from when I was a child.

✓ Well, unfortunately for you, I don't happen to remember my favorite food from when I was a child.

The original contains extraneous words 'show at Favorite Food' that are incorrect and confuse meaning. Remove them to restore the intended phrase 'my favorite food'. Ensure coherence by keeping only relevant noun phrase.

× But I do know when my favorite food is now sushi.

✓ But I do know that my favorite food now is sushi.

The sentence's word order is awkward. Use the correct present tense declarative order 'that my favorite food now is sushi' or 'my favorite food is now sushi'. This preserves present-tense meaning and natural English word order.

× So if I were to accept a burger as a favorite food of mine as a child, I would definitely say it's changed over the years.

✓ So if I were to accept that a burger was my favorite food as a child, I would definitely say it has changed over the years.

The conditional refers to a past state (childhood), so 'was' should be used for the subordinate clause. Use 'it has changed' to indicate change up to the present. This aligns past reference with present perfect for effects continuing to now.