走路— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific details using linking words. Avoid repetition (e.g., "enjoy" used many times) and correct verb forms (e.g., "help me rewind" → "help me relax").

範例: Yes, I walk quite often because it helps me relax. For example, I usually stroll in city parks or gardens to enjoy the trees and flowers, and sometimes I go hiking in nearby mountains because I love nature and fresh air.

建議: Use a clear past-tense topic sentence and provide specific examples. Avoid repeating phrases and fix grammar (e.g., "enjoy take picture" → "enjoyed taking pictures"). Use linking words like "because" or "so" to connect ideas.

範例: Yes, I often walked outside as a child because it was a fun way to relax. For instance, I loved taking pictures of the scenery and sharing them with friends, which helped us bond and remember happy moments.

建議: Give a clear general statement and then support it with two specific, well-phrased reasons. Correct word choice ("rewind" → "relax"), pluralization, and avoid repetition ("flower flowers"). Use linking words like "because", "also", or "for example".

範例: People like walking in parks because they offer peaceful natural surroundings. For example, parks have trees, flowers and quiet paths, so visitors can relax, get fresh air and forget the stress of work or study.

建議: Begin with a direct answer and then give vivid, specific details. Correct grammar ("take the photograph with this landscapes" → "take photographs of the landscapes") and vary vocabulary (use "scenery", "views" instead of repeating "beautiful").

範例: I would like to hike the four major mountains in my country because the scenery is spectacular. I imagine walking along ridges with panoramic views, taking photos of the valleys and sharing those images with friends to remember the trip.

建議: Use a clear past-tense reply and correct word choice ("If memory serves" not "suffers"; "panic" unclear — probably "picnic"). Provide specific, accurate details about activities and avoid vague or incorrect words. Keep it to 2–3 sentences.

範例: If I remember correctly, I recently walked on a suburban mountain near my city. We had a picnic there, sang songs and played hide-and-seek, which made the outing fun and relaxing.

× Actually, I usually take a walk because I think it's a really good way to help me rewind and I really enjoy to enjoy the landscape at the same time.

✓ Actually, I usually take walks because I think it's a really good way to help me unwind and I really enjoy enjoying the landscape at the same time.

The student uses 'to enjoy' after 'enjoy', which is incorrect because 'enjoy' should be followed by a verb in the -ing form (gerund). Also 'rewind' is incorrect in this context; the correct verb is 'unwind'. Additionally, 'take a walk' used repeatedly is better as the plural 'take walks' to indicate habitual action. Suggestion: use gerunds after 'enjoy' and use 'unwind' for relaxation contexts.

× And I really enjoy take a walk in the parks or gardens.

✓ And I really enjoy taking walks in parks or gardens.

After 'enjoy', use the -ing form ('taking') not the base verb ('take'). Use plural 'walks' and omit the definite article before 'parks' when speaking generally. Suggestion: follow 'enjoy' with a gerund and use plural nouns for habitual activities.

× Even went to mountain and go hiking, which is really good for the nature lover like me.

✓ I even went to the mountains and went hiking, which is really good for a nature lover like me.

The original lacks a subject and mixes tenses and forms ('went' then 'go'). Add the subject 'I', use plural 'mountains' if referring generally or 'the mountain' if specific, and keep tense consistent ('went hiking'). Also use the article 'a' before 'nature lover'. Suggestion: include the subject and maintain consistent verb tense.

× Yes, of course, because I think that is a really good way for me to unwind and also I really enjoy take picture with the landscape and I really enjoy share with my friends in order to improve our relationship.

✓ Yes, of course, because I think that is a really good way for me to unwind and also I really enjoy taking pictures of the landscape and I really enjoy sharing them with my friends in order to improve our relationships.

After 'enjoy', use gerunds: 'taking' and 'sharing'. 'Take picture' should be 'take pictures' or 'taking pictures' and use 'of' to indicate the object. 'Share with my friends' should be 'sharing them with my friends'. 'Relationship' is more natural in plural here. Suggestion: use gerunds after 'enjoy', correct prepositions and adjust plurality.

× Also I want to share the happiness with them about that moment.

✓ Also I want to share the happiness with them about that moment.

This sentence is grammatical but slightly awkward. Consider: 'Also I want to share that happy moment with them' or 'Also I want to share my happiness from that moment with them.' The issue is more about natural word order, not a listed grammar error; no forced correction required under given list.

× Because Park has several kinds of greenery and the flower flowers were planted there, which is really good for them to enjoy the natural and also help them to rewind and escape from the tired learning life.

✓ Because parks have several kinds of greenery and flowers planted there, which is really good for people to enjoy nature and also helps them unwind and escape from tiring school life.

'Park' should be plural 'parks' or 'the park'; 'flowers' repeated word fixed; 'the natural' should be 'nature'; 'help them to rewind' should be 'helps them unwind' for subject-verb agreement with the singular idea or change to 'help them' if plural subject. 'Tired learning life' is awkward; 'tiring school life' is more natural. Suggestion: use correct noun forms, avoid repetition, and choose natural collocations.

× I think that is a really good approach to relax.

✓ I think that is a really good way to relax.

'Approach to relax' is not wrong but 'way to relax' is more natural. No specific list error beyond style; suggest using 'way' for naturalness.

× As for me, I really want to go hiking through the four big mountains in my country because I think the view there is really beautiful and also I could take the photograph with this landscapes which is good for me to share with my friends and also enjoy the nature.

✓ As for me, I really want to go hiking through the four big mountains in my country because I think the view there is really beautiful and I could take photographs of these landscapes, which would be good for me to share with my friends and also enjoy nature.

Use 'photographs' (plural) and 'of' to link to 'landscapes'. 'This landscapes' is incorrect; use 'these landscapes'. Also adjust modality: 'could' is acceptable but 'would be' clarifies hypothetical. 'Enjoy the nature' should be 'enjoy nature'. Suggestion: fix demonstrative adjective agreement and preposition use.

× If memory suffers, I went to the mountain in my city which is located in the suburb and I really enjoy that place because we could have a panic there and also sing the song with each other, even playing the game such as sick and hidden.

✓ If memory serves, I went to a mountain near my city, which is located in the suburbs, and I really enjoyed that place because we could have a picnic there and also sing songs with each other, even play games such as 'hide and seek'.

'If memory suffers' is incorrect; correct phrase is 'If memory serves'. Use past tense 'enjoyed' to match 'went'. 'The mountain in my city' changed to 'a mountain near my city' for naturalness. 'Suburb' -> 'suburbs'. 'Have a panic' likely meant 'have a picnic'. 'Sing the song' -> 'sing songs'. 'Playing the game such as sick and hidden' should be 'play games such as hide and seek'. Suggestion: use correct idiomatic expressions, consistent past tense, and correct game name.