走路— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Cevap doğal fakat tekrarlar ve dilbilgisi hataları var; daha kısa ve doğrudan bir konu cümlesi kur, gereksiz tekrarları çıkar. Bağlaçlarla destekleyici ayrıntılar ekle (ör. çünkü, bu yüzden) ve spesifik örnekler ver (nerede yürüdüğün, ne sıklıkla). Ayrıca fiil zamanlarını düzelt ve tekil/çoğul uyumuna dikkat et.

範例: Yes, I walk a lot. I usually walk to the bus stop or around the garden near my apartment because I don't own a car. Also, I often go hiking at weekends, so I walk for an hour or two then.

建議: Cevap iyi bir içerik sunuyor fakat tekrarlamalar, eksik artikeller ve yanlış cümle yapıları var. Doğrudan bir konu cümlesiyle başla, ardından zaman zarfı ve örnek ver; bağlaçlarla akışı netleştir (ör. sonra, bazen). Cümleleri basit ve doğru zamanlarla kur.

範例: Yes, I often walked outside with my parents when I was a child. My school was nearby, so we usually walked there together, and sometimes I walked home with friends after lessons, which was very enjoyable.

建議: Cevap mantıklı ama dolgulama (umm) ve tekrarlar çok fazla. Daha akıcı ve tutarlı olmak için gereksiz sesleri çıkar, tekil/çoğul uyumuna dikkat et (park has → parks have / the park has). Sebep-sonuç ifadelerini kullan (because, so) ve spesifik nedenler ver (ör. temiz hava, alan, oyun imkanları).

範例: People like walking in parks because parks offer fresh air and open space for exercise. Also, families often have picnics or play games there, so parks are especially good for children to burn energy.

建議: Cevap iyi fikir veriyor ancak tekrarlar ve dolgu sözcükleri çok; ayrıca dilbilgisi hataları var (e.g. Paris is a large cultural city; 'whether walking' yanlış kullanım). Cümleyi tek cümleyle net ifade et, nedenleri bağlaçlarla belirt ve spesifik yerlerden bahset (ör. müzeler, anıtlar).

範例: If I had the chance, I'd like to take a long walk in Paris because it is a culturally rich city. I could stroll along the Seine and visit museums such as the Louvre, see Notre Dame and walk to the Eiffel Tower.

建議: Cevap yeterli fakat tekrarlar, zaman uyumu ve anlamsal karışıklıklar var (wanted go to go to cities). Geçmiş zaman kullanırken tutarlı ol, tekrarları çıkar ve nedenleri kısa bağlaçlarla açıkla. Fotoğraf çektiğini belirtirken daha doğal ifade kullan.

範例: I went for a walk in my apartment park last weekend because the weather was sunny and I wanted some fresh air. I walked around the park and took a few photos of the sunny scenery.

× Yes, I generally walk a lot because I don't have car, I don't have a car and I use I use public transportation or I am I walk, I walk, I walk there, but my apartment has has very garden sites in the in the evening, my mother. And I go to go to go to hiking and walking and the garden site.

✓ Yes, I generally walk a lot because I don't have a car and I use public transportation. I walk there, and my apartment has a very nice garden area where my mother and I go for walks and hiking in the evening.

Use of articles: 'a car' requires the indefinite article a. 'a very garden sites' is incorrect; use 'a very nice garden area' or 'very nice gardens'. Also simplify repeated phrases. Suggestion: always include 'a' or 'the' where a countable singular noun appears and choose appropriate adjectives to clarify meaning.

× And yes, I often went outside to have a walk with my parents when I was child.

✓ Yes, I often went outside for a walk with my parents when I was a child.

Missing article and preposition: 'a child' requires the indefinite article. Also 'to have a walk' is less natural than 'for a walk'. Ensure subject-verb agreement and natural collocations by using 'a child' and 'for a walk'.

× I usually, I usually walked walk to the school with my parents because my school was nearby my apartment.

✓ I usually walked to school with my parents because my school was near my apartment.

'Walked walk' repeats and 'the school' is unnecessary when speaking generally; use pluralization appropriately. Use 'near' instead of 'nearby' before a noun; 'nearby' functions as an adjective or adverb. Simplify to avoid repetition.

× And after then after then we went to we went to go to we went to go. Go to school school and sometimes sometimes I walked with my friends after school in street it it was it is very enjoyable and it is.

✓ After that, we went to school, and sometimes I walked with my friends after school in the street. It was very enjoyable.

Excessive repetition and broken structure. 'After then' is incorrect; use 'after that'. Remove repeated fragments and correct noun phrase 'in the street'. Keep tense consistent by using past simple 'was' for past experiences.

× Well, umm as people like to walk in parks umm because because umm parks has umm fresh air and umm park has umm large area and umm and umm if I if people if people boring at home and we go to park park and we we go picnic and we are we are walking.

✓ People like to walk in parks because parks have fresh air and large open areas. If people are bored at home, they go to the park for a picnic and a walk.

Article and agreement errors: 'parks has' should be 'parks have' (plural). Use 'the park' when specific, 'a park' or 'parks' when general. 'Boring at home' needs the adjective 'bored'. Use correct verb forms and articles: 'the park' for specific, 'a park' for one of many.

× And we play, we, we plays a game. And especially children, it is important because children, children's wants to go out.

✓ We play games. It is especially important for children because children want to go out.

Verb form error 'plays' should be 'play' after plural subject 'we'. 'Children's wants' is incorrect possession; use 'children want'. Use plural noun 'games' for general activities. Keep subject and verb agreement.

× Well, if I had a chance, umm, if I had a chance, umm, I, I, I like to take a long walk, umm, in Paris and because, umm, because Paris has very, uh, Paris has very umm, large and uh, cultural city in France and umm, uh, and umm, whether walking.

✓ If I had the chance, I would like to take a long walk in Paris because it is a very large and culturally rich city in France.

Conditional form: Use 'If I had the chance, I would like' for the second conditional. 'Paris has very large and cultural city' is incorrect; describe Paris as 'a very large and culturally rich city'. Avoid repeating and use correct conditional constructions.

× And whether walking I see, I see him, I see other cultural things and I I see Lore Museum, Notre Dame, Notre Dame and Eiffel Tower.

✓ While walking, I would see other cultural sites such as the Louvre Museum, Notre Dame, and the Eiffel Tower.

Tense and vocabulary: 'whether walking' incorrect; use 'while walking' or 'during the walk'. 'I see him' is wrong pronoun and 'Lore Museum' should be 'Louvre Museum'. Use conditional 'would see' after second conditional context and list correct proper nouns.

× Well, I went for a walk in the in the apartment park last weekend because the weather is sunny and quiet and I wanted some fresh air and I wanted, I wanted go to go to cities.

✓ I went for a walk in the apartment park last weekend because the weather was sunny and quiet and I wanted some fresh air, although I had wanted to go to the city.

Tense consistency: Use past tense 'was' to match 'went' and 'wanted'. 'I wanted go to go to cities' is ungrammatical; clarify intention with 'I had wanted to go to the city'. Ensure consistent past tense.