爱好— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and correct small grammar mistakes. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition, and use one or two specific supporting details with linking words. Also correct tense/agreement (e.g., "They help me..." not "It helped").

範例: I have several hobbies, including origami, sketching and video editing. For example, origami and sketching improve my attention to detail, while video editing helps me organize ideas more clearly, so these activities also make me more focused at work.

建議: Make the answer more fluent and remove fillers (uh). Provide one clear example and use linking words to show time or cause. Use correct collocations ("colour creatures" is vague) and avoid repeating "used to" too much.

範例: Yes. As a child I loved drawing and colouring animals and cartoon characters that I watched on TV. Because I practised a lot, I became better at caricatures, which I found very enjoyable and relaxing.

建議: Answer directly with a clear topic sentence, avoid hesitations, and correct grammar ("shades work", "pressure" usage). Use linking words to contrast past and present and give a concrete detail about improvement.

範例: Yes, I have continued sketching since childhood. Back then I practised simple shapes, but now I focus on shading and pressure control to create more realistic drawings, which shows how my skills have developed.

建議: Be more natural and avoid filler words. Start with a clear statement, then give one or two specific examples and a reason. Replace "tattooing" if inaccurate or explain briefly. Keep it within 3–4 sentences.

範例: Yes, my family shares similar hobbies such as sketching, drawing and making mandalas. For instance, we often sit together to design patterns, and sometimes we practise tattoo-style drawing, which helps us bond and spend creative time together.

× Yeah, I do have multiple hobbies like doing origami, drawing, sketching and video editing.

✓ I do have multiple hobbies, such as origami, drawing, sketching, and video editing.

No major grammatical error but improved word choice and punctuation: 'like doing origami' is better as 'such as origami' and a serial comma improves clarity.

× These hobbies help me to bring my creative side out and pay attention to details.

✓ These hobbies help me bring out my creative side and pay attention to details.

Present tense usage is fine but 'help me to bring' is less natural; use bare infinitive after 'help' (help me bring). Word order 'bring out my creative side' is the correct idiomatic order.

× It helped me in my day-to-day work as I can concentrate more to.

✓ They have helped me in my day-to-day work because I can concentrate more.

Tense inconsistency: 'It helped' (past) conflicts with 'I can' (present). Use present perfect 'have helped' to show continuing effect. Also 'concentrate more to' is incorrect; use 'concentrate more' and plural 'They' to match 'hobbies' (subject-verb agreement).

× When I was a child, my hobby was to draw and colour those creatures.

✓ When I was a child, my hobby was drawing and colouring those creatures.

Gerund is preferred after 'hobby was' to name the activity. Use 'drawing and colouring' instead of infinitive 'to draw and colour'. Spelling 'colour' retained as in original.

× I used to draw out caricatures and cartoon characters which I used to, uh, see on televisions and on my daily basis.

✓ I used to draw caricatures and cartoon characters that I saw on television and in my daily life.

Redundant 'used to' repeated; use it once. 'Draw out' is unnecessary; 'draw caricatures' is correct. Use 'that I saw' (simple past) for past habit. 'Television' is uncountable here (not 'televisions') and 'on my daily basis' should be 'in my daily life'.

× And, uh, that was really fun doing.

✓ And that was really fun.

Incorrect verb form and word order: 'really fun doing' is awkward. Use 'that was really fun' to describe the activity in the past.

× Yeah, I do have a hobby since childhood.

✓ Yes, I have had a hobby since childhood.

Tense issue: 'do have' with 'since childhood' is incorrect. Use present perfect 'have had' to indicate an activity continuing from the past to the present.

× It is obviously sketching because I that time when I was a child, I used to sketch and color those, uh, shapes.

✓ It is obviously sketching because at that time when I was a child, I used to sketch and colour shapes.

Missing preposition 'at' before 'that time' (preposition error within tense context) and extra 'I' removed. Tense 'used to' is correct for past habitual actions; retain British spelling 'colour' to match earlier usage.

× And now I have understood more about sketching, how different shades works and how different intensities on and pressure on.

✓ And now I understand more about sketching, how different shades work, and how varying pressure affects the result.

Present tense: 'I have understood' is awkward; 'I understand' or 'I have learned' is better. Subject-verb agreement: 'shades works' should be 'shades work.' The phrase 'how different intensities on and pressure on' is ungrammatical; rephrase to 'how varying pressure affects the result' for clarity.

× Yeah, my family members also are into, uh, handmade work like, uh, sketching, drawing, creating mandala, or doing anything which is related to drawing or sketching.

✓ Yes, my family members are also into handmade work such as sketching, drawing, creating mandalas, or anything related to drawing and sketching.

Subject-verb agreement and word choice: 'also are into' is acceptable but 'are also into' is more natural. 'Creating mandala' should be plural 'creating mandalas.' Use 'such as' instead of 'like' for examples. Simplify 'anything which is related to' to 'anything related to'.

× They also enjoy tattooing with me and I also enjoy doing that with them because it brings our family together.

✓ They also enjoy getting tattoos with me, and I enjoy doing that with them because it brings our family together.

Verb usage: 'enjoy tattooing with me' implies they tattoo others; likely intended 'getting tattoos with me.' Maintain parallel structure and remove redundant 'also' in second clause.

× That's it.

✓ That's all.

'That's it' is colloquial and not ungrammatical, but 'That's all' is a clearer ending in this context. Marked as sentence structure choice rather than grammar error.