爱好— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and organize your list; reduce hesitations and avoid redundancy. Start with a clear topic sentence, then briefly group similar hobbies and give one specific detail or reason for one of them. Use linking words (for example, 'and', 'also', 'for instance') and keep the answer under five sentences.

範例: I have several hobbies. I enjoy designing fashion and often sketch outfits in my free time, and I also play football regularly for exercise and socializing. In addition, I like watching films and reading books to relax. Finally, I catch up with friends each weekend to share our experiences.

建議: Answer directly then give a specific supporting detail. Remove filler words and clarify the reason with one coherent sentence. Use a linking phrase like 'because' or 'for example' to connect your ideas.

範例: Yes, I had a few hobbies as a child. For example, I used to play football almost every day, and I enjoyed watching movies that featured interesting fashion because they inspired my own clothing ideas.

建議: This answer is relevant and gives reasons, but reduce hesitation and avoid repeating phrases. Keep it concise: one clear topic sentence followed by one or two supporting points with linking words ('because', 'so', 'which').

範例: Yes. I've played football since childhood because it taught me teamwork and helped me make friends, which boosted my confidence both socially and academically.

建議: Clarify and simplify your contrast with family using a direct statement and a brief explanation. Avoid vague phrases ('activities which are done in world') and reduce repetition. Use a linking word like 'however' or 'whereas' to show contrast.

範例: I don't share the same hobbies as my parents. Whereas they prefer indoor or cultural activities, I enjoy outdoor physical activities like sports, which help me stay fit and build strength.

× Yes, umm, I do have quite a lot hobbies and one of them being umm, designing, uh, fashion, playing football, watching movies, reading books and interacting with my friends while I talk about our experience throughout the week and the weekdays in my hometown.

✓ Yes, umm, I do have quite a lot of hobbies, and one of them is designing fashion; I also play football, watch movies, read books, and interact with my friends while we talk about our experiences throughout the week in my hometown.

The phrase 'quite a lot hobbies' is missing the preposition 'of' (quantifier + plural noun). 'One of them being' is a sentence fragment; use 'one of them is' for correct subject-verb structure. 'Our experience' should be plural 'our experiences' because multiple people have multiple experiences. Suggestions: include 'of' after 'a lot', change participial fragment to full clause with verb, and make 'experience' plural to match context.

× Yes, I did have few hobbies when I was a child, those being umm playing football, watching movies because I like to watch movies with a fashion idea in them.

✓ Yes, I did have a few hobbies when I was a child; those were playing football and watching movies because I liked to watch films that include fashion ideas.

Using 'few' without an article implies almost none; the intended meaning is 'a few' (some). 'Those being' is better as 'those were' for a complete clause. Maintain past tense 'liked' to match 'when I was a child'. Also use 'films' or 'movies' consistently and clarify 'with a fashion idea in them' to 'that include fashion ideas.' Suggestions: add 'a' before 'few', use full verb 'were', and keep past tense consistent.

× Yes, I do have a hobby uh, which I used to implement since I since uh, childhood and that is uh, playing football because it has helped me learn about teamwork and socialize with my friends, increasing my social activity and self esteem in my academic and personal life.

✓ Yes, I have a hobby that I have had since childhood, and that is playing football because it has helped me learn about teamwork and socialize with my friends, increasing my social activity and self-esteem in my academic and personal life.

The phrase 'used to implement since' is incorrect: 'used to' denotes a past habit and cannot be combined with 'since' which requires a present perfect ('have had since'). Replace with 'have had since childhood'. 'Self esteem' should be hyphenated as 'self-esteem'. Suggestions: use present perfect to express a continuous hobby from past to present and correct collocations.

× I wish I did, but I don't. Umm my parents and me have come a completely different hobby.

✓ I wish I did, but I don't. Umm my parents and I have completely different hobbies.

Use the subject pronoun 'I' (not 'me') when paired with another subject ('my parents and I'). 'Have come a completely different hobby' is ungrammatical; likely intended 'have completely different hobbies'. Also change singular 'hobby' to plural 'hobbies' to match 'my parents and I'. Suggestions: use correct subject pronoun and correct noun number and word order.

× They like to do activities which are done in world while I like to stay outside and engage my body throughout the day which would ultimately help me develop muscles in body.

✓ They like to do activities that are common around the world, while I like to stay outside and keep my body active throughout the day, which ultimately helps me build muscle.

'Which are done in world' is missing articles and a preposition; use 'around the world' or 'in the world'. 'Engage my body' is awkward; use 'keep my body active'. 'Develop muscles in body' should be 'build muscle' or 'develop muscles' and include article/pronoun if needed. Also adjust tense for general truths ('helps' not 'would help'). Suggestions: use natural prepositional phrase 'around the world', idiomatic verbs like 'keep active' and 'build muscle', and present simple for habitual facts.