广告— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more natural and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, correct grammar, avoid repetition, and add one specific detail about the ad to enrich the answer. Keep it within 2–4 sentences and use linking words if adding details.

示例: Yes. I remember a powdered milk advertisement that promised children could grow taller. It made a strong impression on me as a child because the ad showed tall, happy kids playing sports, which made me want to try the product.

建议: Improve cohesion and grammar and be more specific about locations and comparison. Use linking words such as 'however' or 'in contrast' correctly and reduce small errors (e.g., plural forms, articles).

示例: We don't have trains in my city, so I rarely see train advertising. Instead, bus commuters often see adverts played on small TV screens inside buses. In contrast, other cities tend to use stickers and posters on trains.

建议: Make the response fluent and finish sentences fully. Give a brief reason and one example of how ads interrupt you. Avoid repeating 'hate' and use varied vocabulary like 'annoy' or 'interrupt'.

示例: No, I don't like advertisements because they interrupt my experience. For example, when I'm streaming a series, pop-up videos or mid-episode ads are very annoying and break my concentration.

建议: Use correct tense and more precise wording. Start with a clear topic sentence, then contrast past preference with current interest and give a short reason. Keep it concise and natural.

示例: When I was a child, I enjoyed ads shown during cartoons. Now, as a banker, I prefer advertisements about financial technology because they relate to my work and can help me discover useful tools.

建议: Be concise and update tense usage. Begin with a direct statement about current frequency, then compare briefly with the past using a linking word. Provide a specific example of where you see ads online.

示例: Yes, I see advertisements frequently on my phone and computer, especially on social media platforms like Instagram and YouTube. In the past ads were less common online, but now sponsored posts and pre-roll videos appear constantly.

× I remember an ad promoting A powdered milk that can make you tall.

✓ I remember an ad promoting a powdered milk that could make you tall.

The original uses an incorrect capitalized article 'A' before 'powdered milk' and mixes present ability with a past memory. Use lowercase 'a' and change 'can' to 'could' to match the past context of remembering an ad; also 'a powdered milk' is acceptable if referring to a specific product type. Suggestion: use 'a powdered milk' or simply 'powdered milk' depending on whether you mean a specific product or the product type.

× It suddenly gave me an impression of wanting to want or to drink the milk because I was a child.

✓ It suddenly gave me the impression that I wanted to drink the milk because I was a child.

The original has awkward structure and repetition ('wanting to want or to drink'). Replace with 'the impression that I wanted to drink' to make a clear noun clause. Use 'wanted' to keep the past-tense narrative.

× I wanted it to be tall, but yeah.

✓ I wanted to become taller, but I was a child and not serious about it.

'I wanted it to be tall' is unclear and ungrammatical: 'it' likely refers to the speaker and 'to be tall' should be expressed as 'to become taller.' The added clause clarifies intent and fits the past reflection.

× In my city, we don't have trains at all.

✓ In my city, we don't have trains at all.

Sentence is grammatically acceptable; kept unchanged. It correctly uses plural 'trains' for general reference to that transport mode.

× However, when we ride buses or when we commute every day, we often see ads on TV's, not stickers.

✓ However, when we ride buses or commute every day, we often see ads on TVs, not stickers.

Remove redundant 'when' for smoother phrasing. Use 'TVs' (no apostrophe) as the plural of TV; apostrophes should not form plurals.

× It's totally different from other cities, which uses stickers as their main source of ads on trains.

✓ It's totally different from other cities, which use stickers as their main source of ads on trains.

Relative pronoun 'which' refers to 'other cities' (plural), so the verb must be plural 'use' not 'uses.'

× No I don't like advertisements at all, especially when watching movies.

✓ No, I don't like advertisements at all, especially when I'm watching movies.

Add a comma after 'No' for correct punctuation and use 'I'm watching' (present continuous) to describe the ongoing action of watching a movie; this matches natural speech. This is treated as punctuation and tense clarity.

× I hate it when I stream on online platforms and a message just pops up or a video just shows in the middle of watching a series.

✓ I hate it when I'm streaming on online platforms and a message pops up or a video plays in the middle of a series.

Use present continuous 'I'm streaming' for ongoing action and replace 'just shows' with 'plays' for natural collocation. Remove redundant 'just' for clarity.

× I hate that so I.

✓ I hate that, so I avoid ads when I can.

Original is incomplete ('so I' is a fragment). Provide a complete result clause that fits the context: 'so I avoid ads when I can.'

× Before, I like seeing ads on cartoon shows during my childhood.

✓ Before, I liked seeing ads on cartoon shows during my childhood.

The sentence describes a past preference; use past tense 'liked' not present 'like.'

× However, as a career man, I would prefer seeing ads about financial technologies because it is in line with what I do now as a banker.

✓ However, as a professional, I prefer seeing ads about financial technology because they are in line with what I do now as a banker.

'Career man' is unnatural; use 'professional.' Use 'prefer' for general present preference. 'Financial technologies' is better as 'financial technology' as an area; match plural 'ads' with plural verb 'they are.'

× I can still remember when ads weren't a part of your daily browsing routine and TV shows weren't much, showing a lot of ads for a lot of brands.

✓ I can still remember when ads weren't part of our daily browsing routine and TV shows didn't show so many ads for so many brands.

Shift from second-person 'your' to first-person 'our' to match speaker perspective. Rephrase 'TV shows weren't much, showing a lot of ads' to 'TV shows didn't show so many ads' for grammatical clarity and parallelism.

× But as of the moment, ads are very prominent when it comes to social media platforms.

✓ But at the moment, ads are very prominent on social media platforms.

Use 'at the moment' (idiomatic) instead of 'as of the moment.' Use 'on social media platforms' rather than 'when it comes to' for conciseness and clarity.