自行车— Part 1 评分报告

建议: 先直接回答“有”，再按时间顺序说明妈妈为什么买自行车，以及你如何使用它。注意使用过去时，例如“bought”“was”，并将“drive my bike”改为“ride my bike”、“pray”改为“play”。避免重复“excited”，表达控制在三句左右。

示例: Yes, I did. My mum bought me a bike after she saw that my friend had one. I was really excited because I could ride it to my friend’s house and play with them.

建议: 先清楚回答“不太流行”，然后解释香港人通常选择哪种交通方式，以及城市环境为什么不适合骑自行车。“proper traffic”应改为“public transport”，“go work”应改为“go to work”或“commute”，“MPL”可能想表达“MTR”；结尾可说“not very bicycle-friendly”。补充一两个具体原因即可，例如交通拥挤、骑行空间有限。

示例: Not really. In Hong Kong, most people commute by MTR or bus because public transport is convenient. The city can be crowded, and there aren’t many dedicated cycling lanes, so it isn’t very bicycle-friendly.

× My mum bought the bike.

✓ My mum bought a bike.

这里是第一次提到这辆自行车，尚未特指，因此应使用不定冠词“a”，而不是表示特指的“the”。

× She saw my friend have a bike, and I'm so excited because I can drive my bike.

✓ She saw that my friend had a bike, and I was so excited because I could drive my bike.

这段话描述过去发生的事情，动词时态应保持一致：“have”改为“had”，“am”改为“was”，“can”改为“could”。

× Absolutely my mum bought the bike when I tried because she saw my friend have a bike so she bought a bike to meet and I'm so excited excited because I can drive my bike to find my friend to pray.

✓ Absolutely. My mum bought me a bike because she saw that my friend had one. I was so excited because I could drive my bike to find my friend to pray.

原句把多个意思不同的分句连续堆在一起，句子结构不清晰。可以用句号分开完整意思，并用“because”连接原因从句。注意，这里只调整句子结构；“drive”和“pray”等词的用法不属于所列语法类型，因此不作修改。

× People maybe go work by MPL or bikes not really by bicycle, and Hong Kong is not a friendly bicycle.

✓ People may go to work by MPL or by bike, rather than by bicycle, and Hong Kong is not friendly to bicycles.

“go”表示去上班时，通常说“go to work”，不能省略“to”。“friendly”后表示对某对象友好时，使用介词“to”，所以应说“friendly to bicycles”。