自行车— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Your answer is relevant and includes a clear progression from a tricycle to a bicycle. However, several phrases are unnatural or grammatically incorrect, such as “at the beginning,” “there was to adjacent small,” and “with supported to balance the center of gravity.” Use the more natural phrase “two small training wheels,” and avoid overly technical wording like “balance the center of gravity.” Organize the answer into a clear topic sentence followed by one or two supporting details.

示例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. I started with a tricycle because I was too young to balance a bicycle. Later, my father bought me a bicycle with two small training wheels, which helped me learn how to ride safely.

建议: You give a clear opinion and a reason, which is a good basic structure. However, “especially in the that I built of our country” is unclear, and you should say “in the hilly areas” or another specific location if that is your intended meaning. Use “taxes on motorcycles,” “the cost of motorcycles is high,” and “many people use bicycles to commute.” Add a specific example or result to make the answer more precise and coherent.

示例: Yes, bicycles are quite popular in my country, especially in rural and hilly areas. Motorcycles are subject to high taxes, so they can be expensive to buy and maintain. As a result, many people use bicycles for short journeys and for commuting to work or school.

× Yes, when I was a child I had a tricycle at the beginning like when I was not able to control the bike.

✓ Yes, when I was a child, I initially had a tricycle because I was not able to control a bicycle.

The original sentence has an unclear and awkward structure. The phrase like when does not correctly connect the ideas. Use because to explain the reason, and use initially to express at the beginning of the period.

× Then after learning the tricycle, my father bought me a real bicycle and there was to adjacent small with supported to balance the center of gravity so that it won't fall.

✓ Then, after I learned to ride the tricycle, my father bought me a real bicycle, and there were two small wheels adjacent to it to support me and help balance my center of gravity so that I would not fall.

The noun wheels is plural, so use there were instead of there was. The phrase there was to is also incorrect. Use there were two small wheels to introduce the plural noun.

× Then after learning the tricycle, my father bought me a real bicycle and there was to adjacent small with supported to balance the center of gravity so that it won't fall.

✓ Then, after I learned to ride the tricycle, my father bought me a real bicycle, and there were two small wheels adjacent to it to support me and help balance my center of gravity so that I would not fall.

The sentence describes two wheels, so the plural noun wheels is required. A plural noun must also be used with the plural structure there were.

× Then after learning the tricycle, my father bought me a real bicycle and there was to adjacent small with supported to balance the center of gravity so that it won't fall.

✓ Then, after I learned to ride the tricycle, my father bought me a real bicycle, and there were two small wheels adjacent to it to support me and help balance my center of gravity so that I would not fall.

In English, adjectives normally come before the noun they describe. The natural order is two small wheels, while adjacent is placed after the noun in the phrase wheels adjacent to it.

× Then after learning the tricycle, my father bought me a real bicycle and there was to adjacent small with supported to balance the center of gravity so that it won't fall.

✓ Then, after I learned to ride the tricycle, my father bought me a real bicycle, and there were two small wheels adjacent to it to support me and help balance my center of gravity so that I would not fall.

The story is about a past experience. Therefore, would not is more consistent than will not. The past form shows that the possible falling referred to the past situation.

× Then after learning the tricycle, my father bought me a real bicycle and there was to adjacent small with supported to balance the center of gravity so that it won't fall.

✓ Then, after I learned to ride the tricycle, my father bought me a real bicycle, and there were two small wheels adjacent to it to support me and help balance my center of gravity so that I would not fall.

The original sentence contains several incomplete and incorrectly connected phrases, such as to adjacent small and with supported. Use a complete noun phrase, two small wheels, followed by the infinitive phrase to support me.

× Yes, bikes are very popular in my country especially in the that I built of our country.

✓ Yes, bikes are very popular in my country, especially in the part where I live.

The phrase in the that I built of our country is not grammatically complete or clear. Use the complete noun phrase the part where I live to identify a region of the country.

× In our country there is a lot of taxation on the motorcycles so the cost of motorcycles gets very expensive and that is why a large population of the country uses bicycle to commute.

✓ In our country, there is a lot of taxation on motorcycles, so the cost of motorcycles becomes very high, and that is why a large proportion of the population uses bicycles to commute.

When speaking about motorcycles in general, do not use the definite article the before motorcycles. Use motorcycles without an article.

× In our country there is a lot of taxation on the motorcycles so the cost of motorcycles gets very expensive and that is why a large population of the country uses bicycle to commute.

✓ In our country, there is a lot of taxation on motorcycles, so the cost of motorcycles becomes very high, and that is why a large proportion of the population uses bicycles to commute.

A cost is not usually described as expensive. Use high to describe the amount of a cost. Expensive describes a product or service, whereas high describes a price or cost.

× In our country there is a lot of taxation on the motorcycles so the cost of motorcycles gets very expensive and that is why a large population of the country uses bicycle to commute.

✓ In our country, there is a lot of taxation on motorcycles, so the cost of motorcycles becomes very high, and that is why a large proportion of the population uses bicycles to commute.

The sentence refers to bicycles in general, so the plural form bicycles is needed. The singular form bicycle would require an article, such as a bicycle.