自行车— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Answer the question directly and avoid redundant wording such as “when I was a child before.” Use the past tense consistently: “He thought it wasn’t necessary,” and replace “I will would make sure” with “I’ll make sure.” You could also use a linking phrase such as “Because of this” to connect your disappointment with your future plan. Keep the answer to three or four clear sentences.

示例: No, I didn’t have a bike when I was a child because my father never taught me how to ride one. He thought cycling wasn’t necessary for girls, which disappointed me at the time. Because of this, I’ll make sure my daughter learns to ride a bike when she’s old enough.

建议: Use a complete topic sentence, such as “Yes, bikes are very popular in my country.” Avoid sentence fragments like “Popular especially along the coastline.” Correct the word choices and forms: “leisurely rides” rather than “leisurely rights,” and “spend time outdoors” rather than “spend outdoor outdoors.” Add a specific reason or example and use a linking word to make the answer more coherent.

示例: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country, especially in coastal areas. For example, many tourists rent bicycles for leisurely rides along the seafront. This allows them to spend time outdoors while sightseeing, so cycling is particularly common in those places.

× He thought that it is not necessary for girls to ride a bike.

✓ He thought that it was not necessary for girls to ride a bike.

Because the reporting verb thought is in the past tense, the verb in the following that-clause should normally be backshifted from is to was. This keeps the tense consistent when reporting a past belief.

× I was disappointed actually, so I will would make sure that my daughter learns how.

✓ I was disappointed actually, so I would make sure that my daughter learns how to ride a bike.

Will and would cannot be used together in this way. Use would to express a future intention viewed from a past perspective or a hypothetical result. Also, learn how to ride a bike is the complete expression.

× Popular especially along the coastline.

✓ They are popular, especially along the coastline.

The original sentence is a fragment because it does not contain a subject and a finite verb. Adding they are creates a complete sentence and clearly refers to bikes.

× People rent bikes to enjoy leisurely leisurely rights and spend outdoor outdoors while sightseeing.

✓ People rent bikes to enjoy leisurely rides and spend time outdoors while sightseeing.

Leisurely is unnecessarily repeated, and rides is the correct noun for bike trips. Outdoors is an adverb describing where people spend time, while outdoor is an adjective and cannot be used in this position. The phrase spend time outdoors is the natural grammatical expression.