自行车— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repetition and incomplete phrases. Also correct tense and agreement (e.g., "it had" not "it has").

示例: Yes, I did. It was a pink bike with little bow-shaped stickers, and I loved riding it around the neighborhood. As a result, many of the other girls were very envious and often asked where I got it.

建议: Give a direct answer, then support it with clear, specific reasons and avoid fillers. Use correct articles and comparisons (e.g., "in European countries"). Use linking words (because, however, although) to structure your response and avoid contradictory phrases in the same answer.

示例: Yes, bikes are fairly popular in my country because cars are expensive, so many people choose bicycles for short trips. However, unlike in many European countries, cycling here is often practical rather than recreational, so fewer people use bikes for sport or leisure.

× Yes I did and it was pink and it has little bow pictures on it and all of the other girls in my neighborhood, they were all jealous of my bike because it was so beautiful and they were asking me but I got it from and they were saying you are the luckiest child in the world.

✓ Yes, I did. It was pink and it had little bow pictures on it. All of the other girls in my neighborhood were jealous of my bike because it was so beautiful; they kept asking me where I got it and saying I was the luckiest child in the world.

Multiple verbs describe past events, so they should be consistently in the past tense. 'Has' is present tense and should be 'had.' Also 'they were all jealous' can be simplified to 'were jealous.' 'They were asking me but I got it from' is incomplete; change to 'they kept asking me where I got it.' Use past tense for reporting what they said: 'they were saying you are' becomes 'they said I was.' Improve sentence boundaries with punctuation and reduce redundancy. Suggestions: Use past tense forms (had, were, asked, said), split long run-on into shorter sentences, and include the object of 'got it from' by phrasing 'where I got it.'

× I mean, yes, they are because of the car prices here.

✓ I mean, yes, they are because of the car prices here.

This sentence is grammatically acceptable, but it could be clearer by specifying 'because of high car prices here' if that was intended. No article error present requiring correction per the provided list.

× Most of the people use this bikes or cars, but it's not really like a like an European country.

✓ Most people use bikes or cars, but it's not really like a European country.

'Most of the people' is wordy; use 'Most people.' 'This bikes' mixes singular demonstrative with plural noun; use simply 'bikes.' Also 'a European' is correct; 'an European' is wrong because 'European' begins with a consonant sound. Remove duplicate 'like.' Suggestions: Use 'Most people,' match demonstratives to number, and use 'a' before words beginning with a consonant sound.

× So we're not like athletic, so no.

✓ So we are not very athletic, so no.

'We're not like athletic' incorrectly uses 'like' before an adjective. Use 'very' or omit 'like.' Also 'so no' is conversational but acceptable; 'so no' could be replaced with 'so no, not really' for clarity. Suggest removing filler 'like' and using an adverb to modify the adjective.