自行车— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Begin with a clear topic sentence and add a bit more specific detail using a linking word to make it coherent. For example, explain who owned the bike, why you didn't learn, and mention any attempts to learn. Keep it concise (no more than 3–4 sentences). Avoid vague phrasing like "that" without a clear referent.

示例: Yes, I did have a bike when I was a child, but I never learned to ride it. For instance, my older brother owned it and I was too frightened to try when I was small. Later, I attempted once with his help, but I couldn't balance and gave up.

建议: Start with a direct topic sentence and then use linking words (for example, however, because) to add specific reasons and brief evidence. Replace vague phrases like "the biker" with "cyclists" and include a concrete example or comparison to support your point. Keep it within 2–4 sentences.

示例: No, bicycles are not very popular in my country because most people prefer private cars. For example, city roads are crowded and lack dedicated bike lanes, so many potential cyclists feel unsafe.

× Yes I did, but I didn't get to use that since I've never learned how to ride a bike.

✓ Yes, I did, but I never got to use it because I never learned how to ride a bike.

The student mixed past simple ('did') with present perfect ('I've never learned') in a context referring to a past state. Use past simple consistently for past experiences: 'never got' and 'never learned.' Also replace 'that' with the pronoun 'it' for the bike and change 'since' to 'because' for clearer causal meaning in spoken past context. Add a comma after 'Yes' for clarity.

× No, they're not. People tend to use their own personal cars and the country doesn't offer safe roads for the biker.

✓ No, they're not. People tend to use their own cars, and the country doesn't offer safe roads for bikers.

'Personal cars' is redundant; 'own cars' is sufficient. Use plural 'bikers' rather than singular 'the biker' to match general reference. Also add a comma before 'and' to join independent clauses. The original used 'the biker' (definite article) incorrectly for a general group; using the plural without 'the' correctly generalizes the statement.