自行车— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be direct and coherent. Start with a clear topic sentence (Yes/No and brief detail), then add 1–2 specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid unnecessary words and incorrect phrases. Also correct facts and word choice (e.g., four wheels sounds like a quad; mention whether it was electric or not).

示例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. It was a small electric bike with training wheels so I could learn safely. Moreover, it was bright red, which made it easy to spot when I rode in the park.

建议: Improve coherence and grammar by using clear linking words and concise phrasing. Begin with a topic sentence, then give two specific reasons with examples. Avoid repetition (e.g., 'because of the fact that' → 'because') and incorrect article use. Mention exact comparisons or a brief example to support your point.

示例: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country. First, public and private transport is often expensive, so many people choose bicycles to save money. For example, a taxi app like InDrive can be costly for daily commuting, so families often rely on bikes for short trips and errands.

× Yes, when I was a child. Ever.

✓ Yes, I did.

Fragment and awkward word 'Ever' used incorrectly. The examiner asked a yes/no question; respond with a complete clause 'Yes, I did.' to show you had a bike as a child. Avoid sentence fragments and unclear adverbs.

× My dear friend, I had a bike which was comprised of four wheel in order to make sure my safety is well for the wife was a full colour and I.

✓ I had a bike with four wheels to make sure I was safe; it was fully coloured.

Multiple issues: 'comprised of' misused and should be 'with' or 'consisted of', 'four wheel' should be plural 'four wheels', awkward phrase 'in order to make sure my safety is well' corrected to 'to make sure I was safe', and 'the wife was a full colour and I' is unclear and likely erroneous — interpreted as 'it was fully coloured'. Simplify sentences and maintain subject-verb clarity.

× But I was an electric bike.

✓ But it was an electric bike.

Pronoun error: speaker refers to the bike, so use 'it' not 'I'. Using 'I' makes the sentence nonsensical. Ensure pronouns agree with their antecedents.

× Yes, bikes are really popular in my country because of the fact that the transport here is very expensive and although the public transport are available but they are not as affordable as the private ones.

✓ Yes, bikes are really popular in my country because transport here is very expensive; although public transport is available, it is not as affordable as private transport.

Subject-verb agreement and article/quantifier issues: 'the transport' is unnatural, use 'transport' without 'the'. 'Public transport are' should be 'public transport is' because 'transport' is uncountable. Avoid redundant conjunctions 'and although'—use one. Replace 'the private ones' with 'private transport' for clarity.

× There is an app which is called as in Drive that is used but it's also again very expensive.

✓ There is an app called InDrive that is used, but it is also very expensive.

Incorrect use of 'called as'—use 'called' or 'called InDrive'. Unnecessary word 'again' removed. Capitalize proper noun 'InDrive'. Keep clause concise and place commas correctly.

× So everyone had a bike and they use it.

✓ So everyone has a bike and uses it.

Tense inconsistency: 'had' (past) conflicts with general present statement about popularity; use present simple 'has' and 'uses' to describe habitual/current facts. Also ensure subject-verb agreement: 'everyone' requires singular verb 'has/uses'.