自行车— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more concise and clear. Start with a direct topic sentence (e.g., “No, I didn’t have a bike as a child.”), then give one or two specific reasons with linking words. Avoid fillers (“uh”), repetition, and unclear phrases like “in small.” Use past tense consistently and provide a brief detail or example to support your reason.

示例: No, I didn’t have a bike as a child. I couldn’t ride well when I was young, so my parents thought it wasn’t safe to buy one. For example, I fell a few times when I tried, so they waited until I was older and more confident.

建议: Organize your answer with a clear topic sentence and two coherent supporting points using linking words. Avoid incorrect or unclear words (e.g., “Boss”) and repetition. Be specific: mention reasons such as convenience, cost savings, or traffic, and give a brief example about who uses bikes and why.

示例: Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country. They are convenient and cheap, especially for short trips in crowded cities, so many people prefer them to cars or taxis. For instance, my parents use bikes to commute to the market because it saves time and parking money.

× So yeah, I did not have a bike when I was a child because, uh, in small, when I was small, I didn't know well how to ride a bike.

✓ So yeah, I did not have a bike when I was a child because, when I was small, I did not know how to ride a bike well.

The sentence uses past tense appropriately but has word order and adverb placement errors. 'in small' is incorrect; use 'when I was small'. 'didn't know well how to ride' places the adverb incorrectly; in English the adverb 'well' normally comes after the verb phrase 'ride a bike' or before the verb 'know' as 'didn't know how to ride a bike well'. Suggestion: remove 'in small' and move 'well' after the object: 'did not know how to ride a bike well.'

× So that's why my parents did not offer me a bike.

✓ So that's why my parents did not buy me a bike.

'Offer me a bike' is odd in this context; native speakers usually say 'buy me a bike' when referring to providing a child with a bicycle. The past tense 'did not' is correct. Suggestion: replace 'offer' with 'buy' to convey the intended meaning clearly.

× Yes, I do think that bikes are more popular in our country.

✓ Yes, I do think that bikes are popular in our country.

Comparative 'more popular' requires a comparison target; none is given, so use 'popular' to state a general fact. The present simple tense 'do think' is fine. Suggestion: remove 'more' unless comparing to another country or time.

× Having their own bikes can save their time.

✓ Having their own bikes can save them time.

'Save their time' is unidiomatic; English uses 'save someone time' without the definite article. Also 'their' repeated is ambiguous but acceptable for general 'people'. Suggestion: use 'save them time.'

× Instead of using Boss for example, my parents also use My parents also have their own bikes.

✓ For example, instead of using buses, my parents also have their own bikes.

The original is ungrammatical and repetitive. 'Boss' is likely a misspelling of 'buses'. 'My parents also use' followed by 'My parents also have' repeats the subject. Suggestion: simplify to 'For example, instead of using buses, my parents have their own bikes.'

× Because of that they can they.

✓ Because of that, they can save time and travel more easily.

The original fragment 'they can they' is incomplete and ungrammatical. It lacks an object or verb phrase. Suggestion: complete the idea by stating what they can do because of having bikes, e.g., 'save time and travel more easily.'