自行车— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repetition and informal phrases like "gonna." Also correct tense and article errors (e.g. "when I was a child", "I was afraid of riding bikes").

示例: No, I didn’t have a bike when I was a child. I was afraid of riding because I had poor balance and once fell badly, so my parents never bought one for me.

建议: Improve coherence and accuracy. Give a clear topic sentence, then support it with a specific reason and an example, using linking words like "because" or "for example." Fix repetition and word choice (e.g. "rushing hours" → "rush hour").

示例: Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country because traffic is heavy during rush hour. For example, many commuters use bicycles to reach work faster and to avoid long delays on congested roads.

× I didn't have a bike when I was a child because I am afraid of riding a bike and when every time when I ride a bike I feel like I am gonna fall down because I didn't have a sense of good balance.

✓ I didn't have a bike when I was a child because I was afraid of riding a bike; every time I rode a bike I felt like I was going to fall down because I didn't have a good sense of balance.

The sentence mixes past and present tenses incorrectly. The context is childhood (past), so verbs should be in the past tense: 'am afraid' -> 'was afraid'; 'when every time when I ride' is redundant and should be 'every time I rode'; 'I feel like I am gonna fall down' should be 'I felt like I was going to fall down' and avoid informal 'gonna'. Also 'a sense of good balance' is unnatural; use 'a good sense of balance'. Use a semicolon or shorter clauses to improve clarity. Suggestions: Maintain past tense consistently for past events, remove redundant words ('when' or 'every time'), and avoid informal contractions like 'gonna'.

× Yes, bikes are popular in my country because there are too many private cars on the road, especially in the rushing hours. So people are people prefer to ride a bike or move bicycles to go to work.

✓ Yes, bikes are popular in my country because there are too many private cars on the road, especially during rush hours. So people prefer to ride bikes or use bicycles to go to work.

The sentence contains a repetition ('people are people') and awkward phrasing ('in the rushing hours' and 'move bicycles'). 'In the rushing hours' should be 'during rush hours'. 'Ride a bike' can be pluralized to 'ride bikes' to match general statement. 'Move bicycles' is incorrect; use 'use bicycles'. Also pronoun/subject repetition is an error. Suggestions: Remove duplicate words, use standard expressions ('during rush hours'), keep number agreement with general subjects ('people prefer to ride bikes'), and choose appropriate verbs ('use' rather than 'move').