机会— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Answer the question directly in the first sentence, then add specific details about the activity and its impact. Improve grammatical accuracy by using the past tense consistently: “enjoyed,” “taught me,” and “appreciate.” Use natural expressions such as “I’m very grateful for that opportunity” instead of “I am very appreciated.” Also, divide the long sentence into shorter sentences and use linking words such as “because” and “as a result.”

示例: Yes. When I was in junior high school, I joined a swimming club because I had always enjoyed swimming. My teacher taught me four different swimming styles, and I eventually became a very confident swimmer. As a result, I’m very grateful that I had the opportunity to take part in that activity.

建议: Give a clear opinion first, then explain one or two reasons and provide a specific example or result. Correct the unclear phrases “a little bit different difficult,” “which you need some confidence,” and “we used to.” Use natural wording such as “trying new things can be difficult,” “it requires confidence,” and “we gradually get used to them.” Complete the final idea, and use linking words such as “however,” “once,” and “as a result” to make the answer coherent. Keep the response to three or four complete sentences.

示例: Yes, I think people should try a variety of activities because they can discover new interests and develop useful skills. Trying something unfamiliar can be difficult at first, and it requires some confidence. However, once people get used to it, they often become more open-minded and confident. For example, joining a sports club might help someone make friends while improving their health.

× I belonged to the swimming club and I enjoy swimming.

✓ I belonged to the swimming club, and I enjoyed swimming.

The answer describes activities you did as a child, so the past tense is needed. Change enjoy to enjoyed to agree with the past-time expression when I was a junior high school student.

× I am very appreciated that opportunity.

✓ I really appreciate that opportunity.

Appreciate is an active verb, so the subject should be I: I appreciate the opportunity. I am appreciated means that other people value me, which is not the intended meaning.

× Yeah, when I was a junior high school student I belonged to the swimming club and I enjoy swimming and my teacher told me the four styles of swimming and now I can swim very well so I am very appreciated that opportunity.

✓ Yeah, when I was a junior high school student, I belonged to the swimming club and enjoyed swimming. My teacher taught me the four swimming styles, and now I can swim very well, so I really appreciate that opportunity.

The original answer joins too many independent ideas with and and so, making it difficult to follow. Use commas and separate the ideas into two sentences. This also makes the time change from childhood to the present clearer.

× Trying new things is a little bit different difficult.

✓ Trying new things can be a little difficult.

Different and difficult cannot be placed together in this structure. Difficult is the adjective that describes trying new things. The modal verb can also makes the general statement sound natural.

× Trying new things is a little bit different difficult and which you need some confidence.

✓ Trying new things can be a little difficult, and they require some confidence.

Which cannot connect the second clause in this sentence. Use and to join two complete ideas. Because trying new things is plural in meaning, they is used as the subject of require.

× Once we try it, we used to and we can get a new.

✓ Once we try them, we get used to them and can gain new experiences.

Them is needed because it refers to the plural noun things. The expression get used to means gradually become familiar with something; used to by itself does not have that meaning. Use them again after to because it refers to the new things.

× Once we try it, we used to and we can get a new.

✓ Once we try them, we get used to them and can gain new experiences.

The original ending is incomplete: used to needs get before it, and a new is not followed by a noun. Complete the idea with gain new experiences. This produces a grammatically complete sentence.