机会— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Answer the question directly in the first sentence, then explain the situation with one or two specific details. Use correct grammar and natural collocations: say “encourage me to try new activities” rather than “encourage to new activities,” and “offer me extracurricular activities” rather than “offer to me excurricular activities.” Avoid repeating “Also”; use linking words such as “because” and “as a result.”

示例: No, I did not have many opportunities to try new activities as a child. I was quite shy, and my family did not really encourage me to step outside my comfort zone. In addition, my school offered very few extracurricular activities, so I mostly spent my free time at home.

建议: State your opinion clearly and support it with one well-developed reason and example. Correct the grammar and word choice: say “try as many different things as possible,” “experimenting with new activities can help people gain confidence and improve their mood,” and “joining a football club,” not “a different thing,” “gaining, gaining,” or “raise your mood.” Finish your example with a result, and avoid unfinished phrases such as “Someone help?”

示例: Yes, I think people should try as many different things as possible, because new experiences can help them gain confidence and improve their mood. For example, someone who joins a football club may make new friends, become more active, and discover a talent they did not know they had.

× Also my family didn't encourage to new activities.

✓ Also, my family didn't encourage me to participate in new activities.

The verb encourage normally requires an object before the to-infinitive: encourage someone to do something. The original sentence is missing the object me and needs a complete verb structure.

× Also my school didn't offer to me excurricular activities.

✓ Also, my school didn't offer me excurricular activities.

With offer, the natural structure is offer someone something or offer something to someone. When the person comes before the thing, the preposition to is not used: offer me activities.

× I think people should try a different thing, as many different things as possible because experimenting with the new activities, gaining, gaining confidence and raise your mood.

✓ I think people should try as many different things as possible because experimenting with new activities can help them gain confidence and improve their mood.

The phrase a different thing conflicts with the intended plural meaning expressed by as many different things as possible. Use the plural quantifier structure as many ... as possible when referring to multiple activities.

× I think people should try a different thing, as many different things as possible because experimenting with the new activities, gaining, gaining confidence and raise your mood.

✓ I think people should try as many different things as possible because experimenting with new activities can help them gain confidence and improve their mood.

The because-clause in the original sentence is incomplete and contains an unclear sequence of phrases. Adding can help makes the clause grammatically complete and clearly connects experimenting with its results.

× I think people should try a different thing, as many different things as possible because experimenting with the new activities, gaining, gaining confidence and raise your mood.

✓ I think people should try as many different things as possible because experimenting with new activities can help them gain confidence and improve their mood.

When referring to activities in general, do not use the definite article the. Use new activities rather than the new activities unless specific activities have already been identified.

× For example, joining a football club.

✓ For example, someone could join a football club.

The original sentence is only a phrase because joining is not the main verb of a complete sentence. Adding the subject someone and the modal verb could creates a complete example sentence.