机会— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Answer the question directly in the first sentence and use the correct past tense: “I had opportunities,” not “I have opportunities.” Avoid repetition such as “really really,” “in my childhood,” and repeated attempts to restart the sentence. Also, complete the answer with a specific supporting detail, such as who introduced you to football, where you played, or what you learned from it. Use a linking word such as “because” or “as a result” to connect your reason or result.

示例: Yes, I had several opportunities to try new activities as a child. For example, I started playing football at school when I was about eight. I really enjoyed it because it was exciting and gave me the chance to spend time with my friends. As a result, football became one of my favorite hobbies.

建议: State your opinion clearly and avoid repeating the same condition about finances. Correct the grammar by saying “people should” rather than “it should,” “if their financial situation allows them,” and “if they cannot afford it.” Explain why trying different things is beneficial, then add a specific example. A concise structure with an opinion, reason, and example would make the answer more natural and effective.

示例: Yes, I think people should try different activities whenever possible, because this helps them discover their interests and develop new skills. However, they should consider their financial situation and avoid spending money they cannot afford. For example, someone who cannot pay for music lessons could try free online courses or join a local sports club.

× When I was a child, I have opportunities to take part in new sports.

✓ When I was a child, I had opportunities to take part in new sports.

The time expression when I was a child refers to a completed period in the past, so the past tense had is required instead of the present perfect form have.

× I wanted to take a part in this new type of activity.

✓ I wanted to take part in this new type of activity.

The expression take part is a fixed phrase and does not use the article a before part.

× I really enjoyed it in my childhood, so I want to take part in this new type of activity.

✓ I really enjoyed it during my childhood, so I wanted to take part in this new type of activity.

Because the whole situation happened during the speaker's childhood, wanted is needed to maintain the past tense. The phrase during my childhood is also the more natural prepositional expression.

× Yeah, actually I did when I was a child I had opportunities to take part in new sports, for example football, and I had

✓ Yeah, actually I did. When I was a child, I had opportunities to take part in new sports, such as football.

The original response contains several clauses joined without complete punctuation and ends with the incomplete phrase and I had. Dividing the ideas into complete sentences makes the structure grammatically complete.

× I think it should if their financial situations allow them to do that.

✓ I think they should if their financial situation allows them to do that.

The subject people refers to people, so the subject pronoun they is required. It cannot be replaced by the singular, non-human pronoun it.

× Their financial situations allows them to do that.

✓ Their financial situation allows them to do that.

When referring generally to a person's financial circumstances, the singular noun situation is appropriate, and it agrees with the singular verb allows. Alternatively, the plural form would require allow: their financial situations allow them to do that.

× If their financial situations allow them that, but if they can't do that, it can involve different things in their lives.

✓ If their financial situation allows them to do that, they should try different things, but if it does not, that is fine.

The verb allow is followed by a person, to, and a verb: allow someone to do something. Therefore, allow them that is incorrect; allow them to do that is required.

× If their financial situations allow them to do that, but if they can't do that, it can involve different things in their lives.

✓ They should try different things if their financial situation allows them to do so, but if it does not, that is fine.

The original sentence incorrectly combines two if-clauses with but. Use one clear conditional structure and place but between two complete contrasting clauses.

× If their financial situations allow them to do that, but if they can't do that, it can involve different things in their lives.

✓ They should try different things if their financial situation allows them to do so, but if it does not, that is fine.

The original sentence has an unclear subject and an incomplete conditional structure. The revised version gives each clause a clear subject and expresses the intended meaning in a complete sentence.

× So it's their choices.

✓ So it's their choice.

The singular subject it requires the singular complement choice when referring to the decision each person makes. If referring to several separate decisions, use They are their choices instead.