机会— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Answer the question directly in the first sentence and organize the rest of your response with linking words such as “because,” “as a result,” and “since then.” Correct the vocabulary and grammar errors: “a painting competition” instead of “baiting competition,” “I really enjoyed it” instead of “I really enjoyed,” and “I still paint from time to time” instead of “I kind of paint from time to time in these days.” Avoid repeating the same word and idea several times; two or three clear sentences would be more natural and effective.

示例: Yes, when I was in primary school, I took part in a painting competition. I really enjoyed it and eventually won a prize, which made me realize that I had some talent for art. Since then, I’ve continued to paint from time to time.

建议: State your opinion clearly and avoid repeating phrases such as “I believe” and “I think I believe.” Use accurate structures, including “they won’t find out what they are good at” and “which activities they are interested in.” Replace the unclear ending with a specific reason and example. Use a linking word such as “because” or “for example” to connect your ideas, and keep the answer to two or three complete sentences.

示例: Yes, I think people should try a variety of activities because they may discover skills or interests they did not know they had. For example, someone might try a musical instrument for the first time and realize they have a talent for it. Trying new things can also help people become more confident.

× take part in baiting competition

✓ take part in a baiting competition

A singular countable noun such as competition normally needs an article. Use a because the competition is mentioned for the first time.

× When I was at primary school I had the opportunity to take part in baiting competition I really enjoyed and I ended up winning the prize which made me realise I had a talent for baiting and I felt good and I kind of paint from time to time in these days.

✓ When I was at primary school, I had the opportunity to take part in a baiting competition, which I really enjoyed. I ended up winning the prize, which made me realise that I had a talent for baiting. I felt good, and I kind of paint from time to time these days.

The original response is a run-on sentence containing several complete ideas without suitable punctuation or clear clause connections. Divide the ideas into separate sentences and use commas and relative clauses to make the structure clear.

× I kind of paint from time to time in these days.

✓ I kind of paint from time to time these days.

These days is a time expression that does not normally take the preposition in. Use these days to describe a current or recent habit.

× I believed they should because...

✓ I believe they should because...

The student is expressing a present opinion in response to a general question, so the present tense believe is more appropriate than the past tense believed.

× you would not gonna find out

✓ you are not going to find out

Would cannot be followed directly by gonna. Use either you would not find out or, for a future prediction, you are not going to find out. The latter fits this context better.

× which activity or skills you would be interested

✓ which activities or skills you would be interested in

The adjective interested is followed by the preposition in when it refers to the subject of someone's interest. For example, interested in music or interested in new activities.

× which activity or skills

✓ which activities or skills

The sentence refers generally to different possible activities, so the plural noun activities is more suitable. Keep the nouns in the list consistent in number.

× which one you are good at or which activity or skills you would be interested or you get or you'll have a talent. So I think I believe they should out of us when else they can.

✓ You will not find out which activities you are good at, which ones you are interested in, or whether you have a talent for them. So I believe everyone should try as many different things as they can.

The original sentence contains incomplete and disconnected clauses, such as you get, you'll have a talent, and they should out of us. Use a parallel structure with coordinated alternatives: which..., which..., or whether.... The final sentence should directly express the main recommendation.