礼貌— Part 1 评分报告

建议: 先直接回答“我主要是向奶奶学习”，再用一到两个具体细节解释。注意统一过去时，例如用“was”“taught”“showed”；“discipline me or everything”表达不清，可改为“looked after me and taught me good manners”。避免把多个想法连成一个长句。

示例: I mainly learned to be polite from my grandma. My parents were busy with work, so she looked after me and taught me good manners. She always spoke kindly to other people, and I tried to follow her example.

建议: 观点明确，但有些表达不自然，例如“a very basic importance”和“while you are socialized”。可以用“an important part of social interaction”来表达，并补充一个简短例子说明礼貌如何改善交流。注意“polite”的发音和拼写。

示例: Yes, I think politeness is very important because it helps people get along with one another. Simple things like saying “please” and “thank you” can make a conversation feel much friendlier. It doesn’t take much effort, but it can make a big difference.

建议: 回答时可先概括“几乎所有与人互动的场合”，再列举一两个例子，如工作或日常交谈。“every scenario”和“developed world”在这里不够自然，也不需要强调“对自己礼貌”。注意使用“be polite to one another”，并用连接词组织例子。

示例: We should be polite whenever we interact with other people. For example, it’s important at work, when speaking to strangers, and even when dealing with service staff. Being respectful helps create a more positive atmosphere.

建议: 你提供了让路、扶门、说“谢谢”和“请”等具体例子，这是优点。建议按过去时讲述，用“held the door open for people”表达“为别人扶门”；避免“always constantly”这样的重复表达。最后一句没有说完，可补上“whenever I saw them”，并控制在三句左右。

示例: As a child, I tried to show good manners in small ways. I would let older people go first and hold the door open for others. I also said “please,” “thank you,” and “excuse me” in Chinese, and greeted people when I saw them.

× my grandma is the one who disciplined me or everything

✓ My grandma was the one who disciplined me for everything.

这里表达“因为某事而管教我”时，应使用介词 for；or 表示“或者”，不符合句意。

× my grandma is the one who disciplined me

✓ My grandma was the one who disciplined me.

这段话描述的是小时候的经历，时间背景是过去，因此应将 is 改为过去式 was。

× she always do the things herself

✓ She always did things herself.

句子描述的是学生小时候的情况，应使用过去时 did，而不是 do。

× she always do the things herself likes being really polite to other people

✓ She always did things herself, such as being really polite to other people.

原句中 herself 后直接接 likes，导致句子结构混乱。可以用 such as 引出例子，并使句子结构完整、清晰。

× So I basically learned from her and listened to her very well so followed her steps.

✓ So I basically learned from her, listened to her carefully, and followed her example.

原句中 so followed her steps 缺少主语 I，造成分句不完整。并列动作应保持结构完整，在 follow 前补出主语，或像修改句一样将动词并列。

× this is a sign of being civilized human beings

✓ This is a sign of being a civilized person.

person 是可数单数名词，前面需要冠词 a。修改后主语和表语在单复数上也保持一致。

× Being polite is a very basic importance while you are socialized with other people.

✓ Being polite is very important when you socialize with other people.

这里表达的是“你与他人交往”，主语 you 是主动进行 socialize 的人，不应使用被动语态 are socialized。应改为主动语态 you socialize。

× this is the basic manner we should Obvious we should acquire

✓ This is a basic manner that we should obviously acquire.

这里需要修饰动词 acquire，因此应使用副词 obviously，而不是形容词 obvious。另外，原句重复出现 we should，修改后删去了重复部分。

× So no matter you are talking to people, working with others, even you are dealing things by yourself.

✓ So, whether you are talking to people, working with others, or even dealing with things by yourself, you need to be polite.

列举不同情况时，whether 应与 or 配合使用。原句中的 no matter you 结构不完整；这里改用 whether...or... 来连接并列情况。

× you are dealing things by yourself

✓ you are dealing with things by yourself

动词 deal 表示“处理某事”时，通常使用 deal with，因此需要在 dealing 后加介词 with。

× I will sometimes hold the door I will a word hold the door for them

✓ I would sometimes hold the door for them.

问题询问的是小时候做过什么，整段也在描述过去的习惯，因此应用 would 表示过去常做的事，而不是表示将来或现在的 will。重复且不完整的部分不应保留。

× these kind of words

✓ these kinds of words

these 修饰复数名词，kind 也应使用复数 kinds，保持指示词与名词的单复数一致。

× I would definitely greet people whenever I saw

✓ I would definitely greet people whenever I saw them.

这里 saw 后缺少宾语。前面提到 people，因此用宾格代词 them 指代这些人，使从句完整。