礼貌— Part 1 评分报告

建议: 「My parents taught me...」という直接的な主題文はよいです。ただし、「breeze」は文脈に合わないため「please」、「reason carefree」は不自然なので「listen carefully」にしましょう。また、最後の部分は文法的に不明確です。「人が話しているときは注意深く聞くように言われました」のように明確に述べ、具体的な習慣を1つ加えるとよいです。

示例: My parents taught me to be polite when I was a child. They encouraged me to say “please” and “thank you” and to listen carefully when other people were speaking. They also reminded me not to interrupt others.

建议: 質問に直接答え、理由も明確に説明できています。「feel unpleasant」はやや不自然なので、「feel uncomfortable」または「feel offended」にするとより自然です。さらに、職場や日常生活で人間関係がよくなるという具体的な結果を加えると、内容と語彙の幅が広がります。

示例: Yes, I think being polite is very important because it shows respect for others. If we are rude, people may feel uncomfortable or offended. In addition, polite behavior helps us build better relationships at school, at work, and in everyday life.

建议: 「when we are on the trains」より「when we are on public transport」または「when we are on a train」のほうが自然です。例を挙げている点はよいですが、「avoid making a cold」は意味が不明確なので、「avoid making phone calls」または「avoid making too much noise」にしましょう。冒頭で場面を一般化すると、より効果的です。

示例: We should be polite whenever we are in public places, especially on public transport. For example, when we are on a train, we should keep our voices down and avoid making loud phone calls. We should also give our seats to elderly or disabled passengers when necessary.

建议: 「by greeting people」という答えの方向性は適切です。ただし、過去の習慣なので「say」ではなく「said」を使い、「harold」はおそらく「hello」の誤りです。また、「my teachers, my friends」は「my teachers and friends」とつなげましょう。誰に、どのように挨拶したかを具体的に説明すると、より自然で明確になります。

示例: When I was a child, I showed politeness by greeting people properly. For example, I usually said “hello” to my teachers and friends when I arrived at school. I also bowed slightly to my teachers to show respect.

× When I was a child, I tried to show my politeness by greeting people. For example, I usually say harold to my teachers, my friends.

✓ When I was a child, I tried to show my politeness by greeting people. For example, I usually said hello to my teachers and friends.

The question asks about past actions, so the verb say should be changed to its past-tense form said. The phrase my teachers and friends also uses and to connect two people or groups correctly.

× When I was a child, I tried to show my politeness by greeting people. For example, I usually say harold to my teachers, my friends.

✓ When I was a child, I tried to show my politeness by greeting people. For example, I usually said hello to my teachers and friends.

And is needed to connect the two groups of people: my teachers and friends. A comma alone cannot properly connect these items.

× My parents taught me to be polite when I was a child. They told me to say breeze and thank you and to reason carefree when people are speaking, it's very helpful.

✓ My parents taught me to be polite when I was a child. They told me to say please and thank you and to listen carefully when people are speaking because it is very helpful.

An adverb is needed to describe how someone listens, so carefully is appropriate. The phrase because it is very helpful also expresses the reason more clearly than joining two complete clauses with only a comma.

× My parents taught me to be polite when I was a child. They told me to say breeze and thank you and to reason carefree when people are speaking, it's very helpful.

✓ My parents taught me to be polite when I was a child. They told me to say please and thank you and to listen carefully when people are speaking because it is very helpful.

The original sentence contains a comma splice: two complete clauses are joined only by a comma. Use because to connect the reason clause to the main clause and create a complete, well-structured sentence.

× We should be polite when we are on the trains. For example we should keep our voice down or avoid making a cold?

✓ We should be polite when we are on trains. For example, we should keep our voices down or avoid making a call.

The plural noun trains is used when speaking about trains in general, so the article the is unnecessary. Also, the natural expression is make a call, which requires the article a before the singular countable noun call.