礼貌— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Improve grammatical accuracy and sentence variety. Start with a clear topic sentence, use past tense consistently, add linking words and a specific brief example. Keep it within 3–4 sentences. For example, say where or when parents taught you and give one concrete practice they used.

示例: I learned to be polite mainly from my parents when I was little. They taught me basic phrases like “please” and “thank you,” and also showed politeness by treating neighbors kindly, which I copied. Because of these daily examples, politeness became a family habit.

建议: Avoid repetition and tighten expression. Begin with a clear opinion sentence, then give one or two distinct reasons with linking words (for example, “because” or “therefore”). Use varied vocabulary (e.g., “first impressions,” “build rapport”). Keep to 2–3 sentences for clarity.

示例: Yes, I think being polite is very important because it creates a positive first impression and helps build rapport with others. For instance, polite greetings and attentive listening can make people more willing to cooperate or become friends.

建议: Organize the answer with a topic sentence followed by distinct examples using linking words (e.g., “for example,” “also”). Be specific about occasions (e.g., interviews, meetings, family gatherings) and avoid vague phrases like “reveal your real character.” Keep sentences concise and natural.

示例: We should be polite on many occasions, especially during first meetings such as interviews or introductions, because this helps create a good impression. Also, it is important to be polite in professional settings like the workplace and when interacting with elderly people, as this shows respect.

建议: Use past simple consistently and correct phrasing. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give two specific actions with linking words (e.g., “for example,” “also”). Avoid awkward constructions like “I went I was going.” Keep it within 3 sentences and add one brief result or feeling if possible.

示例: As a child, I showed politeness by helping elderly neighbors—for example, I carried their groceries and helped them pick fruit from trees. I also used polite phrases such as “please” and “thank you,” which made them smile and showed my respect.

× First they teach me to say polite words Thank you welcome please and then by their own experience they teach me how to be kind and polite to people.

✓ First they taught me to say polite words like 'thank you', 'you're welcome', and 'please', and then from their own example they taught me how to be kind and polite to people.

The speaker refers to past habitual teaching by 'my parents', so verbs should be in past tense and agree with plural subject. 'Teach' must be 'taught' (past tense). Also punctuation and wording improved for clarity.

× So I can say this is like a lifestyle in our family to be polite.

✓ So I can say that being polite is a way of life in our family.

The original uses awkward structure 'this is like a lifestyle in our family to be polite.' Rewording to 'being polite is a way of life' makes grammar and idiom correct. No tense change required.

× Being polite is very important as it's showing your personality and your ethics.

✓ Being polite is very important because it shows your personality and your values.

'It's showing' is an incorrect continuous use here. Use simple present 'it shows' to express a general truth. 'Ethics' is better rendered as 'values' in this context.

× Especially it's important when you first meet someone because by this way you will show your ethics and personality and you will settle good relations with people.

✓ It is especially important when you first meet someone because this way you will show your values and personality and establish good relationships with people.

'By this way' is incorrect — use 'this way'. 'Settle good relations' is unidiomatic; use 'establish good relationships'. Also use 'values' instead of 'ethics' for natural collocation.

× You will start new chapters with good impression.

✓ You will start new chapters with a good impression.

Missing article before 'good impression'. The noun phrase needs 'a' to be grammatical. The tense (future) is fine.

× Being polite is especially important when you meet someone first time.

✓ Being polite is especially important when you meet someone for the first time.

English requires the prepositional phrase 'for the first time' to express first occurrence; 'someone first time' is ungrammatical.

× This helps to reveal your real character and establish long term relations with people.

✓ This helps reveal your true character and establish long-term relationships with people.

Use 'true' instead of 'real' for idiomatic collocation. 'Long term' should be hyphenated as 'long-term' when used as a compound adjective. 'Relations' is better as 'relationships' in this context.

× Also, being polite is important in professional settings and especially when you are dealing with elderly people.

✓ Also, being polite is important in professional settings and especially when you are dealing with elderly people.

Sentence is acceptable; no correction needed. (Included to show it meets the list; no change required.)

× When I was a child, I showed my politeness by helping elderly people, by carrying their things and helping them to collect fruit from the trees.

✓ When I was a child, I showed my politeness by helping elderly people, carrying their things, and helping them collect fruit from the trees.

Parallel structure is improved by using consistent verb forms: 'by helping', 'carrying', 'helping' -> better to drop repeated 'by' and use parallel gerunds. 'Helping them to collect' -> 'helping them collect' is more natural.

× I went I was going to the market for them.

✓ I went to the market for them.

Original contains a disfluent double phrase 'I went I was going'. Use simple past 'I went' to match past context and be concise.

× Also I was using polite words like thank you, please, you're welcome, et cetera.

✓ Also, I used polite words like 'thank you', 'please', and 'you're welcome'.

'Was using' implies continuous past without need; simple past 'I used' is natural for habitual past actions. Added commas and 'and' for correct list punctuation; removed 'et cetera' for clarity.