礼貌— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Improve grammar, clarity and fluency. Start with a clear topic sentence saying who taught you, then give one or two concise supporting details using correct verb forms and linking words. Avoid fillers (uh, um) and incorrect word choices (e.g., “plight”, “tuition teacher” confusion). Use past tense consistently when describing childhood. Aim for 2–4 sentences, each complete and natural.

示例: My mother and my teachers taught me to be polite when I was a child. For example, my mother always encouraged me to greet neighbors and say “please” and “thank you,” and my primary school teacher corrected my manners in class. As a result, I learned to treat people respectfully in everyday situations.

建议: Clarify meaning and use accurate vocabulary and sentence structure. Begin with a direct opinion sentence, then give a clear reason with an example. Replace incorrect words (“client”, “applied”, “make feel comfort”) with appropriate terms like “polite”, “important”, “feel comfortable”. Use linking words (because, so, therefore) and avoid repetition and hesitations. Keep answers within 2–4 well-formed sentences.

示例: Yes, I think being polite is very important because it helps people feel comfortable and open up. For instance, when I speak politely with classmates, they are more willing to share ideas and cooperate on group projects. Therefore, politeness improves communication and builds trust.

× Well, frankly speaking, my mother always takes me to, uh, to deal plight with everyone.

✓ Well, frankly speaking, my mother always teaches me to deal politely with everyone.

Original sentence uses incorrect verbs and word order: 'takes me to ... to deal plight' is ungrammatical. The intended meaning is that the mother instructs the child, so use 'teaches me' (correct verb) and 'to deal politely with everyone' (correct adverb placement and word choice). This fixes sentence structure and verb usage. Suggestion: use subject + correct verb ('teaches'), then infinitive phrase ('to deal') and an adverb ('politely') before the object.

× Uh, apart from this in my school and my tuition teacher, uh is also explain me to talk with the politely nature.

✓ Besides this, at school my tuition teacher also explained to me how to speak politely.

Problems: incorrect preposition and word order ('apart from this in my school'), verb form and object ('is also explain me'), and awkward phrase 'talk with the politely nature.' Correction uses proper preposition 'at school', past tense 'explained' to match narrative, correct verb pattern 'explained to me how to...', and 'speak politely' as the correct collocation. Suggestion: keep verb tense consistent and use 'explain to someone how to do something' structure.

× This is a good manner, so I always.

✓ This is good manners, so I always try to be polite.

Original is incomplete and uses singular 'a good manner' incorrectly. Use plural 'good manners' or 'a good manner' with different structure; here 'good manners' is more natural. Also finish the thought with a verb phrase 'try to be polite.' Suggestion: ensure sentences are complete with subject and predicate and use correct collocation 'good manners.'

× Yes, being client is very important because when we, uh, when we talk politely with the other, uh, they, they can share their thoughts without any kind of fear or without any kind of hesitation.

✓ Yes, being polite is very important because when we speak politely to others, they can share their thoughts without fear or hesitation.

Errors: 'being client' is wrong word choice; should be 'being polite.' Redundant phrases 'when we, uh, when we' and 'they, they' should be simplified. Use 'speak politely to others' (correct preposition and verb) and concise expressions 'without fear or hesitation.' Suggestion: choose correct adjective 'polite', avoid repetition and redundant phrases, and prefer concise expressions.

× So that's why being applied is very important to make feel comfort.

✓ So that's why being polite is very important to make people feel comfortable.

'Being applied' is incorrect word choice; likely intended 'being polite.' Also 'to make feel comfort' is ungrammatical: correct structure is 'to make people feel comfortable.' Use adjective 'comfortable' not noun 'comfort' in this context and include the affected person ('people'). Suggestion: use accurate adjective and proper infinitive structure 'make someone feel comfortable.'