礼貌— Part 1 评分报告

建议: Be more concise and avoid sentence fragments. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Also correct small grammar and capitalization errors (e.g., "Good Manners and Right Conduct").

示例: I learned politeness mainly at school and at home. For example, in the Philippines we had a subject called Good Manners and Right Conduct in preschool, where teachers taught us polite expressions and respectful behavior; at home my parents reinforced these lessons by modeling courteous manners.

建议: Begin with a direct topic sentence and avoid repetition. Use linking words to connect reasons and provide a specific example. Fix small grammar issues (e.g., "It is" instead of "Is").

示例: Yes, I believe politeness is essential because it shows respect and helps maintain good relationships. For instance, addressing elders politely and listening carefully prevents misunderstandings; therefore, polite language makes daily interactions smoother and more pleasant.

× That's a good question. Actually.

✓ That's a good question; actually,

The original consists of a sentence fragment 'Actually.' which is not a complete sentence. Join it to the previous sentence using a semicolon or comma and add a lowercase 'actually' to form a single, grammatically complete sentence. Suggestion: avoid sentence fragments by linking them to a main clause.

× It's been taught to us.

✓ It was taught to us.

The student used the present perfect passive 'It's been taught to us' which is unnatural here when referring to a past, completed educational practice. Use simple past passive 'It was taught to us' to indicate something taught in the past. Suggestion: use simple past passive for finished events in the past.

× Even during preschool.

✓ Even during preschool,

'Even during preschool.' is a sentence fragment. It should be attached to the previous or following clause. Here, attach it to the preceding sentence with a comma to create a complete idea. Suggestion: avoid standalone fragments by combining them with adjacent sentences.

× We had a subject called good Manners and right Conduct, and they taught us how to interact respectfully with others and especially with adults.

✓ We had a subject called Good Manners and Right Conduct, and they taught us how to interact respectfully with others, especially with adults.

The course title should capitalize principal words: 'Good Manners and Right Conduct.' Also the comma placement and 'and especially with adults' reads better as 'especially with adults' after a comma. Suggestion: capitalize proper names and improve punctuation for clarity.

× Yes, it's very important to be polite with others.

✓ Yes, it is very important to be polite to others.

Use 'to be polite to others' rather than 'polite with others' for more natural collocation. Also expanded contraction for formality consistency. Suggestion: prefer 'polite to' when indicating being courteous toward people.

× It's just basic respect.

✓ It is just basic respect.

This is not strictly a pronoun error, but for consistency avoid contraction; however pronoun use is acceptable. Correction provided to keep formality. Suggestion: keep sentence consistent in formality; contractions are allowed but maintain style.

× You should learn how to interact properly with others, especially those who are older than you.

✓ You should learn how to interact properly with others, especially those who are older than you are.

The original 'older than you' is informal and can be misinterpreted; completing the clause with 'you are' removes ambiguity and is grammatically clearer. Suggestion: in comparisons, complete the clause with 'you are' when clarity is needed.

× Is very essential to learn how to speak and act without having to be rude to anyone.

✓ It is very essential to learn how to speak and act without being rude to anyone.

The sentence is missing a subject 'It' at the start. Also 'without having to be rude' is wordier; use 'without being rude' for conciseness. Suggestion: include dummy subject 'It' for cleft or impersonal constructions and prefer concise phrasing.